1
00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:43,419
(BIRDS TWITTERING)

2
00:01:04,315 --> 00:01:06,776
- None of that ever happened.
- Ever.

3
00:01:06,943 --> 00:01:09,946
(UP-TEMPO ROCK SONG PLAYS)

4
00:02:15,011 --> 00:02:17,388
(MUSIC PLAYS OVER DIALOGUE)

5
00:02:55,593 --> 00:02:57,113
MAN: God, dude,
this campus is awesome!

6
00:02:57,178 --> 00:03:00,264
This is friggin' awesome.
Are you looking at this shit?

7
00:03:00,431 --> 00:03:01,974
This is beautiful.

8
00:03:02,141 --> 00:03:03,142
Do you go to school here?

9
00:03:03,309 --> 00:03:05,436
No, I don't go to school here.
I'm too dumb.

10
00:03:05,603 --> 00:03:07,772
But my best friend
from high school goes here.

11
00:03:07,939 --> 00:03:11,025
Yeah, it's his 21st birthday and me
and my friend are going to surprise him.

12
00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:13,903
- Whoa. Foaming.
- Uh...

13
00:03:14,070 --> 00:03:16,864
- Wait, is that a beer?
- What? No. What are you talking about?

14
00:03:17,031 --> 00:03:19,492
Honestly, man, I'm just so
psyched to see my friends, man.

15
00:03:19,659 --> 00:03:21,285
You know what I'm saying?
Oh, here's the train station.

16
00:03:21,452 --> 00:03:22,453
Yeah, dude,
that's him on the corner.

17
00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:24,163
Yeah, can you just honk
your horn a little bit?

18
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:26,499
(HORN HONKING)
- Yeah, thanks, man.

19
00:03:26,666 --> 00:03:29,252
Hey, you fucking Jew,
get in the cab!

20
00:03:29,419 --> 00:03:32,338
(LAUGHS) Dude, he is
such a fucking tool. What is he wearing?

21
00:03:32,505 --> 00:03:35,466
I love him, but, like, he does dress
like a fucking tool.

22
00:03:35,633 --> 00:03:38,010
- Miller! What's up, man?
- Yo, what's up?

23
00:03:38,177 --> 00:03:39,804
- Come on, bring it in, baby.
- How you doing?

24
00:03:39,971 --> 00:03:41,723
- Dude, how you fucking doing, dude?
- Good.

25
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:43,641
- You look fat.
- What?

26
00:03:43,808 --> 00:03:44,976
- Yeah.
- I mean, I've had midterms.

27
00:03:45,143 --> 00:03:46,436
- I've been stress eating a little bit.
- A little bit?

28
00:03:46,602 --> 00:03:48,271
- A little bit.
- Dude, stop talking about your weight.

29
00:03:48,438 --> 00:03:50,148
- How's Stanford? Good?
- Stanford's great. Honestly.

30
00:03:50,314 --> 00:03:51,858
Actually, yeah,
how's Hakakiqua State?

31
00:03:52,024 --> 00:03:54,652
- It's good, dude, I'm killing it. Yeah.
- Yeah? Kill it! Good.

32
00:03:54,819 --> 00:03:57,572
Dude, how's your family?
And your sister?

33
00:03:57,739 --> 00:03:59,490
- How's your sister?
- My sister? Why are you...?

34
00:03:59,657 --> 00:04:01,951
What? No reason.
I'm just checking in.

35
00:04:02,118 --> 00:04:03,870
You don't have to check in.
She's my sister.

36
00:04:04,036 --> 00:04:05,580
She's 16 years old now.

37
00:04:05,747 --> 00:04:08,875
OK, yeah, she's 16,
but in real life she's, like, 18.

38
00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:11,001
No, in real life she's 16.
That's the whole thing.

39
00:04:11,043 --> 00:04:13,004
And her Facebook photos
are fucking awesome.

40
00:04:13,171 --> 00:04:15,173
- Is that Cancun, where does she...?
(SIGHS)

41
00:04:16,174 --> 00:04:18,843
You know, there's always this moment
right before I see you, where I'm like,

42
00:04:19,010 --> 00:04:20,720
"Why haven't I seen Miller
in so long? It's ridiculous."

43
00:04:20,887 --> 00:04:24,182
"We should keep in better touch."
And then I see you and I'm like,

44
00:04:24,348 --> 00:04:26,934
"Oh, yeah, that's right,
he's a fucking idiot."

45
00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:29,312
I'm just kidding, man, come on.

46
00:04:29,479 --> 00:04:30,959
What if I said that
about your sister?

47
00:04:31,022 --> 00:04:33,024
What if I was like, "I wanna fuck
Danielle." What would you say?

48
00:04:33,191 --> 00:04:36,068
Dude, honestly, I would love
for you to fuck my sister.

49
00:04:36,235 --> 00:04:37,695
- Really? Why?
- Yeah.

50
00:04:37,862 --> 00:04:39,530
It would seriously be
an honor to my entire family

51
00:04:39,697 --> 00:04:41,449
- if you fucked my sister.
(LAUGHS) What?

52
00:04:41,616 --> 00:04:43,910
I'll bet you five bucks that I fuck
your sister before you fuck my sister.

53
00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:47,079
I bet you five bucks that I fuck
my sister before you fuck my sister.

54
00:04:47,246 --> 00:04:49,665
I'll give you five bucks
if you fuck your sister.

55
00:04:49,832 --> 00:04:52,418
OK, can we cool it
with the sister fucking?

56
00:04:53,461 --> 00:04:55,546
This is your friend's place, all right?
Get out.

57
00:04:55,713 --> 00:04:58,841
MILLER: 
Oh, great. This is awesome.

58
00:04:59,008 --> 00:05:01,328
- Jesus Christ, this place is quaint.
MILLER: - Thank you.

59
00:05:01,469 --> 00:05:04,889
- Whoa! I don't know.
- Jesus! Who is that guy?

60
00:05:06,224 --> 00:05:08,559
He's kind of a good dancer.

61
00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:11,354
(CHANTING)

62
00:05:11,521 --> 00:05:13,731
What's up, VisionQuest? Boom.

63
00:05:13,898 --> 00:05:16,901
Dude, if we're not as fucked up as
that guy in two hours, we have failed.

64
00:05:17,068 --> 00:05:18,788
I'd definitely wash
that hand if I were you.

65
00:05:18,820 --> 00:05:20,460
Did you see the headdress?
He's The Chief.

66
00:05:20,488 --> 00:05:21,728
No, he's a street person, dude.

67
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,158
(DOORBELL RINGING)

68
00:05:25,326 --> 00:05:27,703
Nice tie. You look like
Jason Gordon-Levitz.

69
00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:30,915
It's actually
Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

70
00:05:31,082 --> 00:05:32,834
I actually really like him
in <i>500 Days of Summer.</i>

71
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,752
- He's actually a really good actor.
- He is a really good actor.

72
00:05:34,919 --> 00:05:36,504
Had a nice little
transitional period, right?

73
00:05:36,671 --> 00:05:38,191
<i>- Third City from the Sun</i> or...
- Yeah.

74
00:05:38,214 --> 00:05:39,632
BOTH: - Jeff Chang!
- Hey!

75
00:05:39,799 --> 00:05:41,467
MILLER: Yeah! What's up, bud?

76
00:05:41,634 --> 00:05:43,719
Happy birthday,
you tiny yellow son of a bitch!

77
00:05:43,886 --> 00:05:45,930
- Surprise, buddy!
- What are you guys doing here?

78
00:05:46,097 --> 00:05:48,099
I want you to call your lame
friends and cancel your plans

79
00:05:48,266 --> 00:05:51,227
because we're taking you out tonight
and melt your fucking face off!

80
00:05:51,394 --> 00:05:53,813
- Yes. Yes, we are!
- No. Wait, no, no, wait!

81
00:05:53,980 --> 00:05:56,315
- Your face will be fine.
- Guys! Miller, I'm not...

82
00:05:56,482 --> 00:05:57,441
- Yeah, dude.
- Yeah!

83
00:05:57,608 --> 00:05:59,861
- No, no, hey, guys.
- Wow, man, nice place!

84
00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,737
- Guys, guys, guys, listen to me.
- What?

85
00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:04,490
I really appreciate you coming
all the way down here, but...

86
00:06:04,657 --> 00:06:05,992
Do you have any weed?
I smoked all mine on the train.

87
00:06:06,158 --> 00:06:07,910
No, no. Seriously,
I can't go out tonight.

88
00:06:08,077 --> 00:06:10,872
OK? I have my biggest med school
interview, ever, tomorrow morning.

89
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:12,915
Shit! We should've called.

90
00:06:13,082 --> 00:06:16,836
Jeff Chang! You're 21 years old, man.
Your asshole dad isn't here anymore.

91
00:06:17,003 --> 00:06:19,255
- Gentlemen.
- Holy fuck, he is totally here.

92
00:06:19,422 --> 00:06:22,550
Nice to see you again,
Dr. Chang. How's Cathy?

93
00:06:22,717 --> 00:06:25,720
I mean, Mrs. Chang?
I mean, Dr. Mrs. Chang? Fuck me.

94
00:06:25,887 --> 00:06:29,891
You still owe me $17.50
for that hole in my fence, Altman.

95
00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:32,101
Uh, really? That was from,
like, eighth grade.

96
00:06:34,312 --> 00:06:37,565
I didn't know you still
associated with these... people.

97
00:06:37,732 --> 00:06:40,276
No, Dad, I swear,
I didn't know they were coming.

98
00:06:40,443 --> 00:06:43,779
Your interview with Dr. Collins
is at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow morning.

99
00:06:43,946 --> 00:06:45,114
I'll pick you up at seven.

100
00:06:45,281 --> 00:06:47,116
- Your suit is pressed?
- Yeah.

101
00:06:47,283 --> 00:06:50,578
I had to call in a lot of favors
to get you this interview.

102
00:06:50,745 --> 00:06:54,415
Be rested, be sharp,
do not embarrass me.

103
00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:56,292
I won't.

104
00:06:58,753 --> 00:07:00,546
Dick wads.

105
00:07:03,132 --> 00:07:04,175
(DOOR CLOSES)

106
00:07:04,342 --> 00:07:06,969
Look, it was so nice
of you guys to surprise me,

107
00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:09,013
but, listen, I can't go out tonight, OK?

108
00:07:09,180 --> 00:07:10,900
This is like my whole life
in one interview.

109
00:07:10,973 --> 00:07:13,559
- Dude, I totally get it.
- That's funny 'cause I don't.

110
00:07:13,726 --> 00:07:15,561
- I don't totally get it.
- Could we go out tomorrow night?

111
00:07:15,728 --> 00:07:18,022
No, we cannot go out tomorrow night,
because I've got tickets to Soundgarden.

112
00:07:18,189 --> 00:07:19,857
You're a straight-A student, dude.
You can go out one night.

113
00:07:20,024 --> 00:07:21,192
He can't go out, dude.

114
00:07:21,359 --> 00:07:22,860
Casey, first of all,
you need to shut the fuck up.

115
00:07:23,027 --> 00:07:24,487
- And Jeff Chang, you need to sit down.
- No.

116
00:07:24,654 --> 00:07:28,366
Come on, just take a seat,
please, on your nice futon.

117
00:07:28,532 --> 00:07:30,773
Because you have the wrong
attitude right now, my friend.

118
00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:32,995
Look, Jeff Chang,
this isn't just any birthday.

119
00:07:33,162 --> 00:07:34,789
OK? This is your 21st birthday.

120
00:07:34,956 --> 00:07:37,500
- Here we go.
- This is the day that you become a man.

121
00:07:37,667 --> 00:07:40,878
This is the day that you get to tell
every bouncer who's ever carded you,

122
00:07:41,045 --> 00:07:44,632
"You know what? Sure, I get it. Yes, I
look like a nine-year-old Chinese girl."

123
00:07:44,799 --> 00:07:46,217
- What the fuck?
- "But guess what?"

124
00:07:46,384 --> 00:07:48,386
"Today is my 21st fucking birthday."

125
00:07:48,552 --> 00:07:50,846
So, step aside
and let the man come through.

126
00:07:51,013 --> 00:07:52,848
Miller, I totally get it,
but I can't go out tonight.

127
00:07:53,015 --> 00:07:55,393
It's actually not your fault.
It's your people's fault.

128
00:07:55,559 --> 00:07:58,312
Your people haven't been in this
country for a very "rong" time.

129
00:07:58,479 --> 00:08:01,691
- What? He's more American than you.
- My family built the rail roads.

130
00:08:01,857 --> 00:08:04,110
Yeah, but, well, you know
what I mean. Like, your people.

131
00:08:04,276 --> 00:08:06,737
- What? What?
- China. I don't know. Are you Chinese?

132
00:08:06,904 --> 00:08:08,572
- Listen, the point is...
- I understand what you're saying,

133
00:08:08,739 --> 00:08:10,259
- but I can't...
MILLER: - In America,

134
00:08:10,282 --> 00:08:13,077
in the United States of America,
bald eagles and Budweiser,

135
00:08:13,244 --> 00:08:16,038
you go out and drink because
it's a sacred rite of passage.

136
00:08:16,205 --> 00:08:17,915
- It's just like in Africa when...
- Oh, my God.

137
00:08:18,082 --> 00:08:19,709
If we were in Africa...
You are so lucky we're not in Africa.

138
00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:21,460
If we were in Africa, you would
have to leave the village

139
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:22,795
and not come back
till you killed a bear.

140
00:08:22,962 --> 00:08:24,088
None of that is true.

141
00:08:24,255 --> 00:08:26,340
- There's no bears in Africa? Really?
- No.

142
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:28,748
- You have to read a book.
MILLER: - You're 21 years old.

143
00:08:28,759 --> 00:08:32,263
This, as they say in Casey's
home country, is a bar mitzvah.

144
00:08:32,430 --> 00:08:34,671
- It's the American bar mitzvah.
- I was born in America.

145
00:08:34,807 --> 00:08:37,768
It's like... OK, it's like when an
Eskimo kills his first penguin, right?

146
00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:40,656
- Nope, they definitely don't do that.
- Yes, they fucking do, Casey.

147
00:08:40,688 --> 00:08:43,107
- I hate you.
- In this country, Jeff Chang,

148
00:08:43,274 --> 00:08:45,860
your best friends take you out
and they fuck you with alcohol.

149
00:08:46,027 --> 00:08:48,738
- I'm gonna fuck you with alcohol.
- Oh, my God.

150
00:08:48,904 --> 00:08:50,906
- Now who's with me?
- Nope.

151
00:08:51,073 --> 00:08:52,825
- Come on, fuckers!
- Uh-uh.

152
00:08:52,992 --> 00:08:54,113
- Mm-mm.
MILLER: - Whatever.

153
00:08:54,118 --> 00:08:55,870
I'm fucking taking you out
whether you want to or not!

154
00:08:56,037 --> 00:08:57,663
I don't care if you're
scared of your fucking dad.

155
00:08:57,830 --> 00:08:59,206
Dude, we're all scared
of his fucking dad.

156
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:01,375
I'm not! A little bit.

157
00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:03,502
Also, if you do not
come out tonight,

158
00:09:03,669 --> 00:09:05,880
I will stand outside your
bedroom window all night doing this.

159
00:09:06,047 --> 00:09:07,715
(HORN BLARING)
(ALL YELLING)

160
00:09:07,882 --> 00:09:09,683
- OK, OK, OK, I'll go out!
- I can't hear you!

161
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:12,386
- This thing is super loud!
- I'll go out, just stop! Just stop!

162
00:09:12,553 --> 00:09:15,056
That's what I'm saying.
That wasn't so hard.

163
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,808
What kind of asshole brings
an air horn in his backpack?

164
00:09:17,975 --> 00:09:19,310
Honestly, it comes in handy
more than you'd think.

165
00:09:19,477 --> 00:09:22,063
- Just one beer. One beer.
- That's all I wanted.

166
00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:23,439
- We'll take care of you.
- That's it, man.

167
00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:26,006
Nothing's gonna happen to you.
You're my little baby tonight.

168
00:09:26,150 --> 00:09:29,695
<i>♪ You may bury me with an enemy
in Mount Calvary!</i>

169
00:09:29,862 --> 00:09:33,824
<i>♪ You can stack me on a pyre
and soak me down with whiskey</i>

170
00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:35,534
<i>♪ Roast me to a blackened crisp</i>

171
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,286
- Give me a shot!
<i>- ♪ And throw me in a pyre!</i>

172
00:09:37,453 --> 00:09:40,664
<i>♪ I don't really give a shit
I'm going out in style! ♪</i>

173
00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:41,957
(CHEERING)

174
00:09:42,124 --> 00:09:45,544
I'm gonna be 21 forever,
you motherfuckers!

175
00:09:45,711 --> 00:09:49,006
(CHEERING)

176
00:09:50,299 --> 00:09:52,551
- Dude! How you doing?
- I'm doing great, dude.

177
00:09:52,718 --> 00:09:54,358
- Good to see you guys!
- What's up, dude?

178
00:09:54,512 --> 00:09:57,139
It's awesome to see you. Honestly,
'cause I miss you. I miss your hugs.

179
00:09:57,306 --> 00:09:59,350
- Yeah. OK. OK.
- Give me a hug.

180
00:09:59,517 --> 00:10:03,270
Are you, uh... are you...
Are you sure you're OK, man?

181
00:10:03,437 --> 00:10:05,481
You're fine, like,
should we maybe get going?

182
00:10:05,648 --> 00:10:07,441
No, Casey, look at me. I'm fine.

183
00:10:07,608 --> 00:10:08,943
- I'm fine.
- You look fine.

184
00:10:09,110 --> 00:10:10,319
- I'm fine.
- He's fine.

185
00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:12,363
- You know what this bar reminds me of?
- What?

186
00:10:12,530 --> 00:10:15,449
The night we won Rothenberg's
Beer Pong tournament, and Jeff Chang

187
00:10:15,616 --> 00:10:17,827
hooked up with that nine-foot tall
chick who played the banjo.

188
00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:19,314
- Yeah, what was her name?
- Tara.

189
00:10:19,328 --> 00:10:20,496
CASEY: - Tara!
- Yeah, Tara!

190
00:10:20,663 --> 00:10:22,039
She was gigantic.

191
00:10:22,206 --> 00:10:24,125
Man, high school was so awesome.

192
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:26,132
Speaking of the banjo,
you still writing music?

193
00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:29,463
Dude, I'm pre-med, man. I don't
write music. I don't listen to music.

194
00:10:29,630 --> 00:10:31,507
I can't even remember
the last time I went to a show.

195
00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:33,217
- Fuck, man.
- Yeah.

196
00:10:33,384 --> 00:10:35,553
Hey, you're still in for Sidewinder
at The Gorge this summer, right?

197
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:38,389
- Hell, yeah! The Gorge!
- Right, OK! The Gorge!

198
00:10:38,556 --> 00:10:39,932
- Casey, what about you, man?
- Hm?

199
00:10:40,099 --> 00:10:42,601
- The Gorge, Sidewinder.
- Oh, I don't know, man.

200
00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:46,522
Aren't we too old to be doing
the whole music festival thing?

201
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:48,524
Uh, I don't know, Casey, are
we too old to have fun times?

202
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:50,359
- No.
- Are we too old to spend a week

203
00:10:50,526 --> 00:10:52,903
enjoying 250 bands play
the seminal music of our generation?

204
00:10:53,070 --> 00:10:55,698
Are we too old to drop acid and make
love to white chicks in dreadlocks?

205
00:10:55,865 --> 00:10:57,865
- I don't like dreadlocks.
- Are we too old to take

206
00:10:57,867 --> 00:11:00,077
handfuls of Ecstasy and dance around
in fur... with other people in fur?

207
00:11:00,244 --> 00:11:02,121
Yeah, we are too old
for all of those things.

208
00:11:02,288 --> 00:11:03,289
I don't like dreadlocks.

209
00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:05,975
But, guys, all I'm saying is
that we all graduate in May, right?

210
00:11:06,125 --> 00:11:09,628
This could be the last summer all three
of us ever spend together. You know?

211
00:11:11,130 --> 00:11:14,258
Right, but I have a job
lined up after graduation.

212
00:11:15,217 --> 00:11:16,677
- What?
- You got a fucking job?

213
00:11:16,844 --> 00:11:20,890
Yeah. I'm working for
Newbury Capital in New York.

214
00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:23,851
- Dude, congrats, that's a great firm!
- Thanks, Jeff Chang. See?

215
00:11:24,018 --> 00:11:26,395
Yeah, awesome. What about Sidewinder
at The Gorge, Casey?

216
00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:28,105
I'll think about it, all right?
That's all I'm saying.

217
00:11:28,272 --> 00:11:31,650
- Yeah. You're selfish. That's bullshit.
WOMAN: - Jeff! Jeff!

218
00:11:31,817 --> 00:11:34,153
JEFFCHANG: - Oh, Nicole!
- Holy shit, game on.

219
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:36,572
- Hey, how are you doing?
(LAUGHS) Happy birthday!

220
00:11:36,739 --> 00:11:38,824
Hey. Meet my oldest friends,
Miller, Casey.

221
00:11:38,991 --> 00:11:40,534
We used to tear shit up
in high school.

222
00:11:40,701 --> 00:11:42,494
Casey.
Nice to meet you, Nicole.

223
00:11:42,661 --> 00:11:44,413
Wow, that's quite a firm shake.

224
00:11:44,580 --> 00:11:46,123
That's 'cause he masturbates a lot.

225
00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:49,126
Oh, yeah? Me too. I can't get to sleep
without flicking the bean.

226
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:53,714
What? Wow, I guess we already
have a lot in common. That's great.

227
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,507
Yeah, I masturbate a lot, too.

228
00:11:55,674 --> 00:11:57,134
- He does.
- Like a lot.

229
00:11:57,301 --> 00:12:00,095
- Oh.
- At weird places too, like malls,

230
00:12:00,262 --> 00:12:02,223
bathrooms, handicap stalls.
They're bigger.

231
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:04,149
Name some more spots
you jerk off in, Miller.

232
00:12:04,183 --> 00:12:06,185
Sometimes I wear flannel.
Made me feel like a lumberjack.

233
00:12:06,352 --> 00:12:08,646
- What the fuck?
- I am so sorry for him.

234
00:12:08,812 --> 00:12:10,648
I don't even know you.
I feel terrible.

235
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:12,900
What are you talking about? I feel like
she's picking up what I'm putting down.

236
00:12:13,067 --> 00:12:14,188
- Oh.
- Yeah, but then again,

237
00:12:14,318 --> 00:12:17,029
- she's putting it down again.
- But then she picks it back up.

238
00:12:17,196 --> 00:12:19,198
I feel like she'd never
really pick it up twice.

239
00:12:19,365 --> 00:12:22,034
OK, look, I'm just gonna ask.
Who would you rather...?

240
00:12:22,201 --> 00:12:24,036
- Him.
(LAUGHS) Oh, my God.

241
00:12:24,203 --> 00:12:26,123
- OK, it's over. It's over.
CASEY: - Oh, my God.

242
00:12:26,288 --> 00:12:27,915
- This is embarrassing.
- That's fine, that's fine.

243
00:12:28,082 --> 00:12:29,917
Fuck you all, I'm gonna
go play some darts.

244
00:12:30,084 --> 00:12:32,336
Have a really boring life
with my boring friend Casey,

245
00:12:32,503 --> 00:12:34,463
- who played the flute in band.
- Shh.

246
00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:36,757
OK, thanks, buddy. Enjoy.

247
00:12:36,924 --> 00:12:39,134
Wow. Thank you for that.
Oh, my God.

248
00:12:39,301 --> 00:12:41,512
- Here, sit down.
- You're welcome. Thank you.

249
00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:44,348
So, um...
So, that's your friend?

250
00:12:44,515 --> 00:12:46,356
Yeah, we were best friends
back in high school,

251
00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:48,269
but we're not really that close anymore.

252
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,035
Yeah. Your oldest friends are always
your weirdest friends, right?

253
00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:53,440
- Yeah, what is that about?
- I don't know.

254
00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:55,609
People change when
they go to college, right?

255
00:12:55,776 --> 00:12:58,654
Like, I'm sure he wasn't that
big of an idiot back in high school.

256
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:02,470
No, actually, that's exactly
how big of an idiot he was, yeah.

257
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,056
- Hundred percent same amount of idiot.
(LAUGHS) Really? OK.

258
00:13:05,077 --> 00:13:09,498
Yeah. So you're in,
uh, Sigma... Zeta...

259
00:13:09,665 --> 00:13:11,500
- ...circle with a line in it.
- Oh, OK.

260
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,252
- I get it, you're not in a frat?
- No.

261
00:13:13,419 --> 00:13:17,089
- 'Cause I'm not angry and secretly gay.
(CHUCKLES) Wow!

262
00:13:17,256 --> 00:13:18,424
So, what are you drinking?

263
00:13:18,924 --> 00:13:20,551
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

264
00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:26,807
Oh, dude, I'm so glad you guys came.
I really needed this.

265
00:13:26,974 --> 00:13:28,934
- My dad's been driving me crazy.
MILLER: - Yeah man, we love you.

266
00:13:29,101 --> 00:13:31,895
- We wouldn't miss it for anything.
- Miller! (LAUGHS)

267
00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:34,502
Honestly, I'm sorry Casey's
being such a little bitch, though.

268
00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:36,066
- He's not being a bitch.
- Dude, yeah, he is.

269
00:13:36,233 --> 00:13:38,235
Honestly, I feel like he thinks that
he's too good for us and it's like,

270
00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:39,570
"Bro, you're a nerd."

271
00:13:39,737 --> 00:13:41,405
He's not a nerd.
He's our friend.

272
00:13:41,572 --> 00:13:43,198
You're lucky to be hanging out
with us because we're awesome.

273
00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:45,159
Dude, he's just trying to be happy.

274
00:13:45,326 --> 00:13:47,619
So, you leave for Brazil tomorrow?

275
00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:51,582
Yes, and then Chile,
Ecuador and Argentina.

276
00:13:51,749 --> 00:13:53,542
What about you? What are
you doing for spring break?

277
00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:56,211
I have a two week externship
at J.P. Morgan.

278
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:58,172
It's private equity stuff.
It's pretty cool.

279
00:13:59,173 --> 00:14:02,343
- You know? It's not that cool.
- Wait.

280
00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:07,139
So, on the last spring break
of your entire life, you're working?

281
00:14:07,306 --> 00:14:09,558
Yeah, why? Aren't we supposed
to be starting our lives?

282
00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:12,186
- Did your mom tell you that?
- Yeah, my mom did tell me that.

283
00:14:12,353 --> 00:14:14,271
- She did?
- Yeah. Why you hating on my mama?

284
00:14:14,438 --> 00:14:17,066
No, it's just...
I mean, look around. OK?

285
00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:19,318
In ten years, everyone in this
bar will be married with kids,

286
00:14:19,485 --> 00:14:23,072
driving to some boring job
in a fucking minivan.

287
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:26,241
I mean, we got to do as much
crazy shit as we can before then.

288
00:14:26,950 --> 00:14:29,078
No, yeah, exactly.
I totally agree.

289
00:14:31,038 --> 00:14:32,831
We're not too big on crazy here,
are we?

290
00:14:32,998 --> 00:14:36,168
What? No, I'm a huge
proponent of the crazy.

291
00:14:36,335 --> 00:14:38,095
Are you kidding?
I'm the mayor of Crazyville.

292
00:14:38,253 --> 00:14:40,964
- Oh, my God, you're such a dork.
- No! Are you...?

293
00:14:41,131 --> 00:14:45,427
What? Check it. Look, V-neck
sweater with an un-tucked shirt.

294
00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:48,138
- My shit is bananas, girl.
(LAUGHING)

295
00:14:48,305 --> 00:14:51,558
(ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
- I'm just saying, the point is, is that

296
00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:53,852
he's changed and I can tell
that you're upset by it.

297
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:55,396
- I'm not upset. I'm not.
- Yeah, you are.

298
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,689
OK, whatever, message received.
I'm gonna talk to him.

299
00:14:57,856 --> 00:14:59,400
- Dude, no.
- This can't go on. He's hurting you.

300
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:01,443
- He's hurting both of us.
- You don't need to talk to him.

301
00:15:01,610 --> 00:15:03,320
(MAN SHOUTS)
- Holy shit, dude!

302
00:15:03,487 --> 00:15:04,927
- Fuck me!
MILLER: - That's awesome.

303
00:15:04,988 --> 00:15:06,323
It went all the way through.
I can see it.

304
00:15:06,490 --> 00:15:08,867
Oh, my God. Hey, hey...
Oh, my God, I am so sorry, man.

305
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:10,953
- I'm so sorry.
- Problem, homeboy?

306
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:13,288
- No, no. Here, let me take a look.
- Get your hands off me!

307
00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:14,915
I'm gonna be a medical student.
I'll just check...

308
00:15:15,082 --> 00:15:16,163
- Back off!
- Hey, hey, hey!

309
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:18,710
<i>- Step Up, 3D.</i> Take a step back.
- Miller, help me.

310
00:15:18,877 --> 00:15:21,463
- You want to fight?
- Calm down. Nobody wants to dance, OK?

311
00:15:21,630 --> 00:15:23,715
- It was an accident.
- Sorry, we won't touch you.

312
00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:25,008
It was an accident.

313
00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:29,513
Oh, well, guys, I guess
it was just an accident.

314
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:31,515
You know, my face
doesn't even hurt anymore,

315
00:15:31,682 --> 00:15:33,600
now that I know that
it's an accident.

316
00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:36,353
I mean, accidents, they happen
all the time when you're drinking.

317
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:38,280
People get hit by things
like flying darts...

318
00:15:38,313 --> 00:15:40,023
- What's happening?
- ...and flying stools.

319
00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:42,234
What are you doing with the bar stool?
What, you're gonna throw it at us?

320
00:15:42,401 --> 00:15:44,820
(GRUNTING)
- Jesus Christ, man! Are you OK?

321
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:47,197
Now if I ever see
you fucking tampons again,

322
00:15:47,364 --> 00:15:49,616
I will come at you like
a fucking spider monkey!

323
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:51,785
I'll rip your face off, bitch.

324
00:15:51,952 --> 00:15:53,370
I think we should
get the fuck out of here.

325
00:15:53,537 --> 00:15:55,456
- Yeah, let's get the fuck out of here.
- Let's get the fuck out of here.

326
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:58,250
Wow, you seriously
need to get laid.

327
00:15:58,417 --> 00:16:00,210
I know, what do you think
I'm trying to do right now?

328
00:16:00,377 --> 00:16:02,880
- Oh, really, is that what this is?
- Yeah.

329
00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:05,340
- Why, how am I doing? Is it not...
- Eh...

330
00:16:05,507 --> 00:16:07,384
Do you have any, like,
notes or comments or anything?

331
00:16:07,551 --> 00:16:08,511
(LAUGHS)
- We gotta go.

332
00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:10,137
What? No, I'm talking to Nicole.

333
00:16:10,304 --> 00:16:11,555
That's a really great story.
We gotta go.

334
00:16:11,722 --> 00:16:12,803
- Yeah.
- No, I'm not going.

335
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:13,932
We need to get out of this bar.

336
00:16:14,099 --> 00:16:16,685
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

337
00:16:23,192 --> 00:16:25,033
OK, what could have
possibly went down in there

338
00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:26,487
that you had to pull me away from her?

339
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:29,364
What? Dude, that wasn't gonna happen.
She's a hard nine, you are a soft six.

340
00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:31,992
- Oh, what the fuck, man?
- Wow.

341
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:34,411
- Shit.
- OK, where we going? Let's go.

342
00:16:34,578 --> 00:16:36,914
No, man, it's eleven o'clock.
We're done.

343
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:39,041
OK. OK.

344
00:16:39,708 --> 00:16:41,835
Oh, dude, there's like 20 bars nearby.
That's awesome. Let's do it.

345
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:45,923
No, we gotta get Jeff Chang home, man.
His dad is gonna fucking flip.

346
00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:48,842
- What are you? A pussy?
(LAUGHING)

347
00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:50,844
- That's awesome.
- You fucking pussy!

348
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:52,346
How many fuckin' shots
did you give him in there?

349
00:16:52,513 --> 00:16:54,598
Relax, OK? He drank us both
under the table in high school.

350
00:16:54,765 --> 00:16:56,767
- Yeah, I remember.
- Oh, shit, the Galway.

351
00:16:56,934 --> 00:16:58,694
These fuckers have been
carding me for years.

352
00:16:58,769 --> 00:17:01,271
- Whoa! Jeff Chang! Car!
(HORN HONKING)

353
00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:03,607
- Fuckers!
- What the hell? Where is he going?

354
00:17:03,774 --> 00:17:05,817
All right, dude, relax, one more bar
and then we'll go home. I promise.

355
00:17:05,984 --> 00:17:09,279
- All right. She was cute, right?
- Yeah, she was cute.

356
00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:11,031
- She's just not my type.
- What is your type?

357
00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:12,616
Girls that wanna
have sex with me.

358
00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:15,536
- ID?
- Oh.

359
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,664
You got ID or not, man? Just
come back when you hit puberty.

360
00:17:19,331 --> 00:17:22,584
Twenty-one. Blackjack,
motherfucker!

361
00:17:22,751 --> 00:17:24,044
- Whatever, just go the fuck inside.
- What?

362
00:17:24,211 --> 00:17:26,505
- What? What?
- You're good, go in.

363
00:17:26,672 --> 00:17:28,507
Where are the white women at?

364
00:17:28,674 --> 00:17:30,676
(RAP MUSIC PLAYING)

365
00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:53,323
(CHEERING)

366
00:18:10,716 --> 00:18:12,801
(RAP MUSIC CONTINUES)

367
00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:17,347
(CHEERING)
(BELCHING)

368
00:18:23,854 --> 00:18:25,147
(CHEERING)

369
00:18:25,314 --> 00:18:27,566
CROWD: 
Drink, drink, drink, drink!

370
00:18:30,569 --> 00:18:32,362
(CHEERING)

371
00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:34,781
(FARTING SOUND)

372
00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:45,125
- Yeah!
(CHEERING)

373
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:47,502
Take it off, yeah!

374
00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:52,215
(CHEERING)
- Oh...

375
00:18:52,382 --> 00:18:54,259
(LAUGHTER)
- Oh, my God!

376
00:18:54,426 --> 00:18:56,553
(GASPING, SHOUTING)

377
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:58,889
(SCREAMS)
(LAUGHING)

378
00:18:59,056 --> 00:19:01,558
Holy shit, dude! Stop pissing!
Stop pissing! Stop it!

379
00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:03,018
What the hell are you doing?

380
00:19:03,185 --> 00:19:05,270
(LAUGHING)

381
00:19:05,437 --> 00:19:07,064
I'll just talk to myself.
Awesome.

382
00:19:07,606 --> 00:19:08,899
Man, this is ridiculous.

383
00:19:09,066 --> 00:19:12,736
(RAP MUSIC PLAYING)
(CHEERING)

384
00:19:13,862 --> 00:19:15,463
CASEY: 
Miller, we have to get him home.

385
00:19:15,530 --> 00:19:18,200
- Three waters, please.
- Dude, it's too late.

386
00:19:48,897 --> 00:19:51,692
- They're gonna need a new bull.
- This is not funny.

387
00:19:51,858 --> 00:19:53,902
Yeah, let's put him down.
He's really heavy.

388
00:19:54,403 --> 00:19:55,487
- Oh, my God.
(MOANING)

389
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:57,948
Jeff Chang's dad is gonna
fucking honor kill him

390
00:19:58,115 --> 00:19:59,282
if we don't get him
to that interview.

391
00:19:59,449 --> 00:20:02,077
Relax, he's gonna be fine, man.
Let's just get him home.

392
00:20:11,128 --> 00:20:12,170
Yeah, so where are we?

393
00:20:14,172 --> 00:20:16,717
How do I feel like
none of this looks familiar?

394
00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:18,135
Did we come from...?

395
00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,638
Jeff Chang, where do you live?

396
00:20:23,181 --> 00:20:26,601
- Home...
- Yeah, home, how do we get home, bud?

397
00:20:28,979 --> 00:20:31,857
(SLURS) Suck my shit.
CASEY: - OK, hey, hey.

398
00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:34,784
Get you home, we can get you rested.
Just give us your address, buddy.

399
00:20:34,943 --> 00:20:36,987
We'll get you a good night's sleep,
a nice cup of coffee.

400
00:20:37,154 --> 00:20:38,572
Dude, that's not gonna work.
You gotta shake him.

401
00:20:38,739 --> 00:20:40,073
- What?
- Wake up, asshole!

402
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:41,880
- Tell us where you live.
- Didn't you...?

403
00:20:41,908 --> 00:20:44,786
I know that you're in there
and I know that you can hear me.

404
00:20:44,953 --> 00:20:47,497
- Didn't you have his address?
- Yeah, I do, uh...

405
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,207
It's back at his apartment, though.

406
00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:50,625
All right, well,
maybe it's in his wallet?

407
00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:54,254
Yeah, check his wallet.
He's really passed out, man.

408
00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:56,965
No, that's his parents' address.
I know that one. Fuck!

409
00:20:57,674 --> 00:21:00,051
- Yeah, let's call his parents.
- Yeah, let's.

410
00:21:00,218 --> 00:21:03,388
Let's call Dr. Chang, the scariest man
in the entire world, and be like,

411
00:21:03,555 --> 00:21:05,474
"Hey, what's going on,
Dr. Chang?"

412
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,350
"We took your son out,
got him shitfaced

413
00:21:07,517 --> 00:21:09,561
and totally ruined his future.
Oops. Sorry."

414
00:21:09,728 --> 00:21:12,009
OK, look, Casey, we don't know
where Jeff Chang lives. OK?

415
00:21:12,022 --> 00:21:13,690
We don't know anybody who knows
where Jeff Chang lives,

416
00:21:13,857 --> 00:21:15,901
- so it seems like...
- Wait. Oh, my God. Nicole.

417
00:21:16,067 --> 00:21:17,235
Dude, stop thinking
with your penis.

418
00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:19,988
No, no, no. Nicole,
she's friends with Jeff Chang.

419
00:21:20,155 --> 00:21:22,657
- She might know where he lives.
- OK, cool. Did you get her number?

420
00:21:22,824 --> 00:21:24,659
- No.
- No, because you can't close.

421
00:21:24,826 --> 00:21:26,620
No, because you pulled me away
from her before I fucking could.

422
00:21:26,787 --> 00:21:28,455
- You know that.
- You could never close.

423
00:21:28,622 --> 00:21:31,208
She was closeable. I would've closed.
Jeff Chang could've closed.

424
00:21:31,374 --> 00:21:32,626
You know what?
Nicole lives in a sorority.

425
00:21:32,793 --> 00:21:35,504
If we could find her sorority house,
we could find her.

426
00:21:35,670 --> 00:21:38,423
OK, Casey, there's 40,000
people at this university.

427
00:21:38,590 --> 00:21:41,051
There is no way that I'm gonna
go looking for one person,

428
00:21:41,218 --> 00:21:42,969
who may or may not
know where he lives.

429
00:21:43,136 --> 00:21:45,972
That is dumb. No. No.

430
00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:48,099
"No." No, never.

431
00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:50,185
(RAP SONG PLAYING)

432
00:22:01,822 --> 00:22:02,906
MILLER: Oh, hey, it's The Chief.

433
00:22:03,073 --> 00:22:05,617
Dude, what is The Chief doing
all the way over here?

434
00:22:05,784 --> 00:22:07,786
- I wish I was homeless.
- Oh, my God.

435
00:22:07,953 --> 00:22:11,039
Think about it, man, they got no stress.
They have no responsibilities.

436
00:22:11,206 --> 00:22:12,958
What responsibilities
do you have?

437
00:22:13,124 --> 00:22:15,252
Dude, I have a cat that
needs love and affection

438
00:22:15,418 --> 00:22:17,254
and I have to take her on walks.

439
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:21,091
- You don't take cats on walks.
- I take my cat on walks.

440
00:22:21,258 --> 00:22:22,884
She has fat legs.

441
00:22:27,681 --> 00:22:29,349
CASEY: Dude, I really don't
want to fuck this up.

442
00:22:29,516 --> 00:22:31,768
Jeff Chang has wanted to be
a doctor his whole life.

443
00:22:31,935 --> 00:22:33,103
MILLER: Maybe he should've
thought about that

444
00:22:33,270 --> 00:22:34,312
before he went out drinking tonight.

445
00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:37,774
- Yeah, 'cause this is all his fault.
- What is that supposed to mean?

446
00:22:37,941 --> 00:22:39,985
You forced him to go out
and made him get drunk.

447
00:22:40,151 --> 00:22:42,271
Jeff Chang is a grown man
and he made his own choices.

448
00:22:42,362 --> 00:22:43,738
There was no air horn
involved anywhere?

449
00:22:43,905 --> 00:22:45,115
Nope.

450
00:22:45,282 --> 00:22:47,742
Great. Seems like you haven't
changed at all, that's nice.

451
00:22:47,909 --> 00:22:50,120
Yeah, well, you've changed
because in high school,

452
00:22:50,287 --> 00:22:51,788
- you were sorta cool, Casey.
- What is this jabbing my leg?

453
00:22:51,955 --> 00:22:55,250
But now, you are not cool.
Now you're just super douchey.

454
00:22:55,417 --> 00:22:57,294
- What the fuck?
- Holy shit.

455
00:22:57,460 --> 00:22:59,780
- What is Jeff Chang doing with a gun?
- I don't know, man.

456
00:23:00,463 --> 00:23:01,756
Take him.

457
00:23:03,008 --> 00:23:04,968
- Dude, this is a real gun, man.
- I know.

458
00:23:05,135 --> 00:23:07,804
I got it.
He's on the riflery team, right?

459
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,683
You think this guy's OK?
He didn't say anything to you, did he?

460
00:23:11,850 --> 00:23:13,059
No one's trying
to hurt him or anything?

461
00:23:13,226 --> 00:23:15,562
No. But we don't talk as much
as we used to. You know?

462
00:23:17,147 --> 00:23:19,399
(SIGHS) All right, let’s just
keep going, I guess, right?

463
00:23:19,566 --> 00:23:22,086
I want to shoot something
if I have this fucking gun in my hand.

464
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:24,230
- Please don't. Please don't.
- Can I kill a squirrel?

465
00:23:24,362 --> 00:23:26,990
- Miller, put the fucking gun away.
- OK.

466
00:23:27,157 --> 00:23:29,534
- Let's go.
- I'll kill one later.

467
00:23:37,792 --> 00:23:41,338
- So, what sorority is Nicole in?
- Sigma Zeta something.

468
00:23:41,504 --> 00:23:43,214
Dude, her sorority letters
were written on her rack.

469
00:23:43,381 --> 00:23:44,633
How do you not remember them?

470
00:23:44,799 --> 00:23:46,426
I was more interested
in what she had to say, dude.

471
00:23:46,593 --> 00:23:47,886
Yeah, well, if you
had been a normal guy

472
00:23:48,053 --> 00:23:49,813
and stared at her tits,
we'd be home already.

473
00:23:50,055 --> 00:23:53,183
- Speaking of tits, how is your sister?
CASEY: - Oh, my God.

474
00:23:53,350 --> 00:23:54,851
MILLER: Sigma Zeta Theta,
could that be it?

475
00:23:55,018 --> 00:23:56,519
- Yeah, that's actually right.
- Oh.

476
00:23:57,354 --> 00:23:59,606
(BELL RINGING)
- Vaginas!

477
00:23:59,773 --> 00:24:01,274
Yeah, you wanna tell us
where you live, man?

478
00:24:01,441 --> 00:24:02,859
(CHUCKLES)
(MUMBLES) Big vagina.

479
00:24:03,026 --> 00:24:06,196
OK. Let's just lock that away for
a few minutes and act normal, OK?

480
00:24:06,363 --> 00:24:09,491
CASEY: - Oh, hello!
MILLER: - Hello. How are you?

481
00:24:09,658 --> 00:24:11,242
CASEY: - Hi.
MILLER: - Hi.

482
00:24:12,202 --> 00:24:14,829
Awesome. Is Nicole in?

483
00:24:16,039 --> 00:24:17,374
Is this some sort of
pledge thing?

484
00:24:17,540 --> 00:24:20,502
- I want cereal. Count Chocula.
- Shh. Jeff Chang.

485
00:24:20,669 --> 00:24:22,470
- All right.
CASEY: - You don't have to write.

486
00:24:22,504 --> 00:24:24,047
MILLER: The answer is...

487
00:24:24,214 --> 00:24:26,633
Oh, no, don't even worry about it.
Just tell Nicole to come downstairs.

488
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:27,968
Just tell her it's Casey.

489
00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:31,179
It's a funny story, actually.
She'll totally love this.

490
00:24:31,346 --> 00:24:33,056
Fuck! Well, what are
we gonna do now, man?

491
00:24:33,223 --> 00:24:34,349
That was so weird.

492
00:24:34,516 --> 00:24:35,809
Hold him.

493
00:24:37,769 --> 00:24:40,981
- What are you doing?
- Come on.

494
00:24:41,147 --> 00:24:43,233
- Don't leave me with the baby.
- Bring the baby. Come on.

495
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,402
- I can't... fuckin'...
- Let's go around the back.

496
00:24:46,820 --> 00:24:48,029
(MUTTERS) Motherfucker.

497
00:24:48,196 --> 00:24:52,158
Hey. Dude, no, we're not
breaking into a sorority.

498
00:24:52,325 --> 00:24:54,486
MILLER: (WHISPERS)
Don't be scared. They're just girls.

499
00:24:56,037 --> 00:24:57,706
Oh, jackpot. Yes.

500
00:24:57,872 --> 00:25:00,375
What? Do you have a better idea?

501
00:25:01,668 --> 00:25:04,254
- Come on.
- I fucking hate you.

502
00:25:05,630 --> 00:25:07,090
Watch his head.
Watch his head.

503
00:25:07,257 --> 00:25:09,259
It's gonna be fine,
everything's gonna be fine.

504
00:25:09,843 --> 00:25:11,011
(THUDDING)

505
00:25:11,177 --> 00:25:14,097
- Oh, Jesus. I'm sure he's fine.
- Great.

506
00:25:15,265 --> 00:25:16,224
(JEFFCHANG MOANS)

507
00:25:16,391 --> 00:25:18,071
(WHISPERS) Oh, God,
Jeff Chang, be careful.

508
00:25:18,101 --> 00:25:19,269
Shh!

509
00:25:21,271 --> 00:25:24,816
Hey, wait, wait, wait.
Was Nicole Latina?

510
00:25:24,983 --> 00:25:26,234
She could be half-tina.

511
00:25:26,401 --> 00:25:29,571
I don't know, man.
She seemed pretty Nordic to me.

512
00:25:29,738 --> 00:25:33,950
Dude, Cameron Diaz is Latina. It's just
a meaningless ethnic signifier. Come on.

513
00:25:35,577 --> 00:25:37,418
You know, sometimes,
you say the stupidest shit

514
00:25:37,454 --> 00:25:40,749
and other times it's like, Cameron Diaz,
Latina, I never even thought of that.

515
00:25:40,915 --> 00:25:43,334
- Shh!
- Yeah, I really liked her in Shrek.

516
00:25:43,501 --> 00:25:45,336
MILLER: Yeah, dude,
Shrek was fucking tight.

517
00:25:45,503 --> 00:25:48,840
JEFFCHANG: - I'm hungry!
- Shh, Shh, Shh!

518
00:25:49,007 --> 00:25:50,967
(LOUDLY) I want waffles!
- Shit.

519
00:25:51,134 --> 00:25:53,470
- Go.
- I want waffles! (MUFFLED)

520
00:25:53,636 --> 00:25:56,556
He is way too loud.
We definitely can't bring him with us.

521
00:25:56,723 --> 00:25:58,003
Right, so, what are we gonna do?

522
00:25:58,058 --> 00:26:00,060
Well, we can't just
leave him here, man.

523
00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:05,648
(CHANTING) Hi-ya. Hi-ya,
hi-ya, hi-ya. Hi-ya, hi-ya...

524
00:26:05,815 --> 00:26:07,776
Chill out with the rain dance.
I'm trying to tie you to the can.

525
00:26:07,942 --> 00:26:09,611
(SOFTLY) Hi-ya, hi-ya...

526
00:26:09,778 --> 00:26:12,489
- Is this really the best idea?
- Probably not.

527
00:26:12,655 --> 00:26:15,658
- Let's hump and dump.
- That's not an expression, but OK.

528
00:26:25,376 --> 00:26:28,046
(WHISPERS) "Rosa. Maria"?

529
00:26:28,213 --> 00:26:31,299
"Incarnazion"?
Dude, something is wrong...

530
00:26:37,472 --> 00:26:39,182
Dude, what are you doing?

531
00:26:41,601 --> 00:26:43,603
(MOANING)

532
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,105
(DOOR OPENING)

533
00:26:53,279 --> 00:26:55,532
(JEFFCHANG MOANS SOFTLY)

534
00:26:55,698 --> 00:26:56,991
(MOANS LOUDER)

535
00:26:57,992 --> 00:26:58,993
Lupe?

536
00:27:00,286 --> 00:27:03,123
(MOANING)
- Honey, are you OK?

537
00:27:03,289 --> 00:27:04,958
(MOANING)

538
00:27:05,125 --> 00:27:07,794
Got a little cramp?
Need a tamp?

539
00:27:08,711 --> 00:27:09,963
WOMAN 1: Have you seen my bra?

540
00:27:10,130 --> 00:27:11,631
(WHISPERS) Go, go, go.
WOMAN 2: - Maybe it's in your room.

541
00:27:11,798 --> 00:27:13,508
Fuck, it's a dead end.

542
00:27:13,675 --> 00:27:14,884
Go, go, go!

543
00:27:21,224 --> 00:27:25,687
Pledge Gomez and Pledge Aguilar are
eager for our spanking, Pledge Mistress!

544
00:27:27,063 --> 00:27:28,898
(JEFFCHANG MOANING)
- Lupita, are you OK?

545
00:27:34,070 --> 00:27:37,407
WOMAN: - Lupe.
(JEFFCHANG SHRIEKS)

546
00:27:38,032 --> 00:27:38,950
(WHISPERS) Lupe.

547
00:27:39,117 --> 00:27:40,869
Is something wrong,
Pledge Mistress?

548
00:27:41,035 --> 00:27:42,662
Why are we not being spanked?

549
00:27:44,414 --> 00:27:47,375
- Don't, don't, don't.
- We wait eagerly, Pledge Mistress.

550
00:27:49,752 --> 00:27:52,172
Pledge Mistress, we are
deserving of this spanking.

551
00:27:52,338 --> 00:27:54,632
(WHISPERS) Yes, they are.
- What are you doing?

552
00:27:54,799 --> 00:27:56,259
I'm gonna spank that ass.

553
00:27:56,426 --> 00:27:58,761
- No.
- Shh. I hear something.

554
00:27:58,928 --> 00:28:00,513
- Go check the door.
- We want to be spanked by you,

555
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:02,265
Pledge Mistress.

556
00:28:04,267 --> 00:28:06,102
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

557
00:28:08,897 --> 00:28:11,149
I feel nothing. Again.

558
00:28:11,316 --> 00:28:14,152
Pledge Aguilar requests
a spanking of her own, Pledge Mistress.

559
00:28:19,657 --> 00:28:20,658
(MOANING)

560
00:28:23,912 --> 00:28:25,455
What the fuck?

561
00:28:30,210 --> 00:28:32,045
- Fucking...
- I love sorority chicks.

562
00:28:34,547 --> 00:28:36,507
Pledge Mistress,
is there a man in the room?

563
00:28:38,259 --> 00:28:39,093
MILLER: Um...

564
00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:41,012
CASEY: (WHISPERS)
Well, say something.

565
00:28:41,179 --> 00:28:44,849
That's right, pledges.
This is a new part of your initiation.

566
00:28:45,016 --> 00:28:47,727
- Really, because that's not...
- Yeah, I don't know about that...

567
00:28:47,894 --> 00:28:49,771
Girls, this is
what the Pledge Mistress said.

568
00:28:49,938 --> 00:28:51,564
Guys, do you want me
to have to call Pledge Mistress?

569
00:28:51,731 --> 00:28:53,932
BOTH: - No, no.
- I don't want to call Pledge Mistress.

570
00:28:53,942 --> 00:28:55,818
You know how she gets this time
of night, but I will wake her up

571
00:28:55,985 --> 00:28:57,528
and tell her you're
being disobedient pledges.

572
00:28:57,695 --> 00:28:59,822
- We're sorry.
- Yeah.

573
00:28:59,989 --> 00:29:03,201
- That's better.
- What's our new assignment?

574
00:29:03,368 --> 00:29:05,370
(WHISPERS)
Find Nicole. Find Nicole.

575
00:29:05,536 --> 00:29:07,413
- Your new assignment...
- Find Nicole.

576
00:29:07,580 --> 00:29:09,582
- ...is to start making out.
- What?

577
00:29:11,709 --> 00:29:13,169
(MOANS)

578
00:29:22,553 --> 00:29:23,805
(SLURS) Candy.

579
00:29:24,847 --> 00:29:26,683
I'm hungry.

580
00:29:35,566 --> 00:29:37,235
(WHISPERS) Who the fuck is this?

581
00:29:39,904 --> 00:29:41,281
(GRUNTS)

582
00:29:42,782 --> 00:29:44,284
(GRUNTS)

583
00:29:55,545 --> 00:29:56,838
(WHIMPERS)

584
00:29:57,672 --> 00:30:00,550
(WHIMPERING)

585
00:30:03,344 --> 00:30:05,346
(GAGGING)

586
00:30:14,522 --> 00:30:15,898
Candy bar.

587
00:30:17,108 --> 00:30:18,526
This is so wrong.

588
00:30:21,321 --> 00:30:25,158
Relax, all the kids go les nowadays.
Isn't that right, Becca?

589
00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:28,911
Yeah, totally, but how is this
part of our sorority training again?

590
00:30:30,121 --> 00:30:32,832
I have no idea, but I love you.

591
00:30:33,708 --> 00:30:36,044
I want to make beautiful lesbian
babies with both of you.

592
00:30:36,210 --> 00:30:37,503
Look, do either of you guys...

593
00:30:37,670 --> 00:30:39,310
- God, they're really going at it.
- Yeah.

594
00:30:39,339 --> 00:30:41,591
Do either of you guys know
which room Nicole is in?

595
00:30:41,758 --> 00:30:44,135
Nicole? There's no Nicole
in this sorority.

596
00:30:44,302 --> 00:30:46,179
- What?
- She's not here.

597
00:30:46,346 --> 00:30:48,598
Dude... we're in the wrong sorority.

598
00:30:48,765 --> 00:30:51,309
No, dude, we're
in the right sorority.

599
00:30:52,602 --> 00:30:55,146
(PANTS)

600
00:30:56,814 --> 00:30:58,358
- Eyes!
(SCREAMS)

601
00:30:58,524 --> 00:30:59,776
- Throat!
(GASPS)

602
00:30:59,942 --> 00:31:01,986
- Groin!
(GRUNTS)

603
00:31:02,153 --> 00:31:04,322
All right, we do have
to get going soon.

604
00:31:04,489 --> 00:31:05,948
Yeah. No, we'll get going.

605
00:31:06,115 --> 00:31:08,576
MILLER: Becca? Hey, sorry.

606
00:31:08,743 --> 00:31:11,343
- Will you grab her boobie a little bit?
- Come on, man, that's...

607
00:31:11,454 --> 00:31:15,833
WOMAN: (SHOUTING)
Intruder in the house! Intruder!

608
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,877
I'm so sorry.

609
00:31:18,044 --> 00:31:20,254
- Go, go!
- Go, go, go!

610
00:31:20,421 --> 00:31:22,131
Hey, get your ass back here!

611
00:31:22,298 --> 00:31:25,301
(MOANING)
(WOMEN SHOUTING)

612
00:31:25,468 --> 00:31:26,886
- Jeff Chang!
- Jeff Chang, we're coming!

613
00:31:27,053 --> 00:31:28,262
(SHRIEKING)

614
00:31:28,888 --> 00:31:29,889
What the hell?

615
00:31:30,973 --> 00:31:32,058
Hey!

616
00:31:32,225 --> 00:31:33,601
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)

617
00:31:33,768 --> 00:31:35,228
We're gonna kick your ass!

618
00:31:35,395 --> 00:31:38,106
Ladies, please,
can we just talk about this?

619
00:31:38,272 --> 00:31:40,024
- Holy shit!
- Oh, window!

620
00:31:40,191 --> 00:31:42,819
Go, go, go, go!

621
00:31:42,985 --> 00:31:46,114
WOMAN: - We're gonna fuck you up!
- Motherfuckers!

622
00:31:48,783 --> 00:31:50,118
How we gonna get him down?

623
00:31:50,701 --> 00:31:51,536
Uh...

624
00:31:53,246 --> 00:31:55,039
- We're gonna throw him off.
- What? No.

625
00:31:55,206 --> 00:31:57,500
Trust me. A pool cover's like a giant
pillow. I've done this a thousand times.

626
00:31:57,667 --> 00:32:00,753
- You have?
- We're gonna beat your ass!

627
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:03,756
- OK, on three.
- Oh, my God, look.

628
00:32:03,923 --> 00:32:05,049
That's Nicole's sorority.

629
00:32:05,216 --> 00:32:06,717
- Oh, cool. OK.
- All right.

630
00:32:07,718 --> 00:32:10,054
BOTH: One... two...

631
00:32:10,221 --> 00:32:12,098
- Fuck.
- ...three!

632
00:32:16,018 --> 00:32:16,894
(CRASHING)

633
00:32:17,061 --> 00:32:18,062
Oh, my God.

634
00:32:18,229 --> 00:32:20,898
(WOMEN CONTINUE SHOUTING
INDISTINCTLY)

635
00:32:21,065 --> 00:32:22,400
Did we just kill Jeff Chang?

636
00:32:22,567 --> 00:32:24,360
(ALL YELLING)

637
00:32:25,528 --> 00:32:26,529
Jump!

638
00:32:29,574 --> 00:32:31,617
(WOMEN CONTINUE
SHOUTING NEARBY)

639
00:32:31,784 --> 00:32:32,827
Oh, my God!
Dude, they're everywhere!

640
00:32:32,994 --> 00:32:34,996
CASEY: Jeff Chang is
covered in rose thorns.

641
00:32:35,163 --> 00:32:36,803
- Open the fucking door!
- Can I help you?

642
00:32:36,956 --> 00:32:39,750
- Oh, my God, thank God you're white.
- Is Nicole here?

643
00:32:39,917 --> 00:32:41,711
- Uh, yes, but... OK...
- Awesome.

644
00:32:41,878 --> 00:32:43,963
Um, she doesn't want to see you.

645
00:32:44,672 --> 00:32:46,424
MILLER: - OK, just be careful.
CASEY: - Oh, my Lord.

646
00:32:46,591 --> 00:32:47,925
MILLER: 
I'm looking at his asshole. Oh!

647
00:32:48,092 --> 00:32:50,219
So, whose idea was it
to throw Jeff off the roof?

648
00:32:50,386 --> 00:32:53,055
Uh, Casey.
It was Casey's idea.

649
00:32:53,222 --> 00:32:55,808
Wow. I was all wrong about you.

650
00:32:55,975 --> 00:32:57,852
Had you pegged for
a real straight arrow.

651
00:32:58,019 --> 00:32:59,459
Oh, no, he is.
He went to space camp.

652
00:32:59,479 --> 00:33:01,230
- Thanks, man.
- Straight arrow.

653
00:33:01,397 --> 00:33:03,232
Yeah. I have a bit of a wild side.

654
00:33:03,399 --> 00:33:04,442
- Oh, yeah?
- Hm-mm.

655
00:33:04,609 --> 00:33:07,987
Sometimes after eating,
I jump right into the pool.

656
00:33:08,154 --> 00:33:10,698
- I don't even wait 20 minutes.
- You're a fucking renegade.

657
00:33:10,865 --> 00:33:11,991
CASEY: - Yeah, you think so?
- Yeah.

658
00:33:12,158 --> 00:33:14,758
Sometimes at night... (WHISPERS)
I don't even wear my mouth guard.

659
00:33:14,911 --> 00:33:16,245
(WHISPERS) Oh, my God.
- And I'm supposed to.

660
00:33:16,412 --> 00:33:17,997
- That's recommended.
(LAUGHS)

661
00:33:18,164 --> 00:33:19,665
- You're funny.
- Thanks.

662
00:33:19,832 --> 00:33:21,712
- I think you're funny too.
NICOLE: - Thank you.

663
00:33:21,751 --> 00:33:23,836
What the fuck are you guys doing?
OK, look, I go to the window

664
00:33:24,003 --> 00:33:25,421
to check out for our safety,
and I come back,

665
00:33:25,588 --> 00:33:28,466
it's all bananas in pajamas.
Let's get serious.

666
00:33:28,633 --> 00:33:31,719
- Do you know where Jeff Chang lives?
- I don't, I'm sorry.

667
00:33:31,886 --> 00:33:33,566
Do you know
any of his friends or anything?

668
00:33:33,638 --> 00:33:35,723
I met Jeff in my remedial
science study group,

669
00:33:35,890 --> 00:33:37,767
but he didn't really talk
to anyone else so...

670
00:33:37,934 --> 00:33:40,311
There we go, back at square one.
Not a single clue.

671
00:33:40,478 --> 00:33:43,272
Wait, your remedial
science group?

672
00:33:43,439 --> 00:33:45,600
Yeah, I'm a Bio major.
I tutor kids who are struggling.

673
00:33:45,691 --> 00:33:47,026
OK, no, Jeff Chang is Asian.

674
00:33:47,193 --> 00:33:49,320
- There's no remedial in that language.
- Yeah.

675
00:33:49,487 --> 00:33:52,240
Nicole, Jeff Chang
invented science, OK?

676
00:33:52,406 --> 00:33:54,408
Actually, he's failing
out of school.

677
00:33:56,536 --> 00:33:59,956
- This Jeff Chang, right here?
- Yeah. This Jeff Chang.

678
00:34:00,122 --> 00:34:01,207
You guys didn't know that?

679
00:34:01,374 --> 00:34:02,875
- No. No.
- What?

680
00:34:03,042 --> 00:34:06,212
What is going on with Jeff Chang?
First the gun and now this?

681
00:34:06,379 --> 00:34:07,899
Why wouldn't he tell us
he was failing?

682
00:34:07,964 --> 00:34:10,004
I don't know. Maybe he was
embarrassed or something.

683
00:34:10,049 --> 00:34:12,343
We're his best friends. You tell
your best friends stuff like that.

684
00:34:12,510 --> 00:34:13,886
Maybe we're not friends
like that anymore.

685
00:34:14,053 --> 00:34:16,889
What? OK, we're
in the middle of a crisis here.

686
00:34:17,056 --> 00:34:18,975
You're just gonna drop that
kind of shit on me right now?

687
00:34:19,141 --> 00:34:21,477
Listen, Nicole, is there
like a campus address book,

688
00:34:21,644 --> 00:34:24,188
or do you know anyone that
might know where he lives?

689
00:34:24,355 --> 00:34:26,399
No. Oh, wait,

690
00:34:26,566 --> 00:34:28,486
- Randy might know where Jeff lives.
- Oh, great.

691
00:34:28,568 --> 00:34:31,153
He's the campus pep leader.
He has every student's address

692
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,121
in his phone for sending out
flyers and stuff.

693
00:34:33,281 --> 00:34:35,449
- So Randy is a cheerleader?
- Yell leader.

694
00:34:35,616 --> 00:34:37,256
- Oh, yell leader.
- Completely different.

695
00:34:37,326 --> 00:34:39,912
- Yeah, I didn't realize, OK.
(SCOFFS) Straight to voice-mail.

696
00:34:40,079 --> 00:34:41,372
Oh, he's at the pep rally.

697
00:34:41,539 --> 00:34:43,082
You know what? I'm going to
a party on that side of campus,

698
00:34:43,249 --> 00:34:45,042
- I can take you guys over there.
- Great!

699
00:34:45,209 --> 00:34:46,669
OK, look, no, guys.
We can't just run out of here.

700
00:34:46,836 --> 00:34:48,296
We're surrounded by
Latins right now.

701
00:34:48,462 --> 00:34:49,964
They're coming in hot.
They're frickin' everywhere.

702
00:34:50,131 --> 00:34:52,508
- No worries. I have a car.
- She has a car!

703
00:34:52,675 --> 00:34:55,052
Nice. A little bit of a road trip?
We're on a mission.

704
00:34:55,219 --> 00:34:58,222
CASEY: - OK, there she is.
WOMAN 1: - Go that way!

705
00:34:58,389 --> 00:35:00,433
Oh, fuck, what is that?
It looks like a toy.

706
00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:02,685
WOMAN 2: - Look over here!
CASEY: - It's fine, it's a car.

707
00:35:02,852 --> 00:35:03,853
- We're coming.
- Dude, there's no way.

708
00:35:04,020 --> 00:35:05,354
There's Hispanics everywhere.

709
00:35:05,521 --> 00:35:07,064
WOMAN 3: - Check the bushes.
- OK, we gotta go, come on!

710
00:35:07,231 --> 00:35:09,692
No, no. This is stupid.
We're not gonna fit in that thing.

711
00:35:09,859 --> 00:35:12,194
- We'll be fine.
- I've taken shits bigger than that.

712
00:35:12,361 --> 00:35:14,363
I cannot believe you're jeopardizing
our mission for some girl.

713
00:35:14,530 --> 00:35:16,282
- Why? You think she likes me?
- No, you're a fucking nerd.

714
00:35:16,449 --> 00:35:18,209
CASEY: 
That's what I was saying. It's like,

715
00:35:18,242 --> 00:35:19,910
I think she would date a guy
that rides a mountain bike...

716
00:35:20,077 --> 00:35:22,204
- Shh!
- ...or like surfs in Costa Rica.

717
00:35:22,371 --> 00:35:24,373
Where do I fit in?

718
00:35:24,540 --> 00:35:26,900
- Fuck, this really isn't gonna work.
MILLER: - I told you.

719
00:35:26,917 --> 00:35:27,752
(WHISTLE TRILLING)

720
00:35:27,918 --> 00:35:29,712
(WOMAN SHOUTS IN SPANISH)

721
00:35:29,879 --> 00:35:32,715
(WHISTLE TRILLING)
WOMAN: - There they are!

722
00:35:32,882 --> 00:35:34,884
MILLER: - Go, go, go!
(TIRES SQUEALING)

723
00:35:40,806 --> 00:35:42,391
Get the fucking van.

724
00:35:44,602 --> 00:35:46,354
(RAP SONG PLAYS)

725
00:35:58,407 --> 00:36:00,127
CASEY: Is the pep rally
even still going on?

726
00:36:00,242 --> 00:36:02,161
NICOLE: Oh, yeah,
we've got State tomorrow.

727
00:36:02,328 --> 00:36:04,048
This campus is gonna
be going off all night.

728
00:36:04,163 --> 00:36:05,998
Oh, nice.

729
00:36:06,165 --> 00:36:07,917
Well, thanks for the ride.

730
00:36:08,084 --> 00:36:10,127
So, how are we gonna
find this Randy guy?

731
00:36:10,294 --> 00:36:12,838
Pep rally's right down that path.
Just look for the big truck.

732
00:36:13,005 --> 00:36:15,766
It's called the Spirit Mobile.
Randy should be around there somewhere.

733
00:36:15,883 --> 00:36:17,444
You sure you don't
want to come with us?

734
00:36:17,468 --> 00:36:20,388
I'd love to, but I'm already
super late to my party.

735
00:36:20,554 --> 00:36:22,598
And why is Randy gonna give us
Jeff Chang's address?

736
00:36:22,765 --> 00:36:23,974
Oh, because he's my boyfriend.

737
00:36:24,767 --> 00:36:25,726
What?

738
00:36:25,893 --> 00:36:28,396
- Didn't I tell you that?
- Uh, no.

739
00:36:28,562 --> 00:36:30,481
- Yeah.
MILLER: - Nicole, have a great night.

740
00:36:30,648 --> 00:36:33,567
- Thank you so much. You're a gem.
- OK, well, good luck.

741
00:36:33,734 --> 00:36:35,569
- OK.
- Great. Thank you.

742
00:36:35,736 --> 00:36:36,779
Bye.

743
00:36:39,281 --> 00:36:42,493
- Just don't.
- Casey, I'm not gonna say anything.

744
00:36:43,452 --> 00:36:45,037
Can't believe she has
a boyfriend, though, right?

745
00:36:45,204 --> 00:36:46,580
I thought she would have
said something earlier.

746
00:36:46,747 --> 00:36:50,376
It makes sense. That's why she wasn't,
you know, feeling me.

747
00:36:50,543 --> 00:36:52,128
But I'm not gonna say anything.
I won't say anything.

748
00:36:52,294 --> 00:36:54,046
I don't want to rub salt in your wound
'cause I could tell you're hurting...

749
00:36:54,213 --> 00:36:55,493
(MARCHING BAND PLAYS
IN DISTANCE)

750
00:36:55,631 --> 00:36:57,311
But I didn't know
she had a boyfriend. Wow.

751
00:36:57,425 --> 00:36:59,051
Let's just find this guy, OK?

752
00:36:59,218 --> 00:37:01,053
I bet he's huge, by the way.

753
00:37:01,220 --> 00:37:04,640
Probably super flexible.
The guy could probably blow himself.

754
00:37:04,807 --> 00:37:07,935
I'd blow myself,
but I have a long torso.

755
00:37:08,102 --> 00:37:09,645
But seriously,
does your sister ask about me?

756
00:37:09,812 --> 00:37:11,772
(INDISTINCT SHOUTS OUTSIDE)

757
00:37:11,939 --> 00:37:12,940
WOMAN 1: Check the alley!

758
00:37:13,107 --> 00:37:15,109
WOMAN 2: Let's find
these motherfuckers!

759
00:37:17,653 --> 00:37:19,113
(WOMEN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

760
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:20,990
What the hell's going on out here?

761
00:37:22,658 --> 00:37:25,578
Hey... have you seen these guys?

762
00:37:25,745 --> 00:37:26,996
I've been looking
for them all night.

763
00:37:27,163 --> 00:37:29,665
They were also carrying
a drunk Asian kid.

764
00:37:29,832 --> 00:37:32,877
Oh, I got you,
you little turds.

765
00:37:33,377 --> 00:37:36,672
(PEOPLE SHOUTING)
(MARCHING BAND PLAYING)

766
00:37:42,762 --> 00:37:44,180
(SNORTING)

767
00:37:51,645 --> 00:37:53,856
Hey, let's check over there
by the big truck.

768
00:37:55,858 --> 00:37:58,486
Oh, look, cheerleaders!
Let's ask the cheerleaders.

769
00:37:58,652 --> 00:38:00,780
Uh, excuse me! Excuse me!

770
00:38:00,946 --> 00:38:03,386
- Do you know where Randy is?
- He's behind the Spirit Mobile.

771
00:38:03,491 --> 00:38:04,617
Oh, thank you.

772
00:38:12,333 --> 00:38:14,210
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

773
00:38:14,376 --> 00:38:16,796
Excuse me, hey, are you Randy?

774
00:38:18,088 --> 00:38:20,633
- Oh, no.
- What the fuck you doing here?

775
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,551
MAN: Who's this guy, Randy?

776
00:38:22,718 --> 00:38:24,720
These are the motherfuckers
that threw a dart at my face.

777
00:38:24,887 --> 00:38:27,139
- Break them down, Randy.
- Wait, this is the guy from the bar?

778
00:38:27,306 --> 00:38:28,140
Yeah.

779
00:38:28,307 --> 00:38:30,976
You got a lot of nerve
coming into my house.

780
00:38:31,143 --> 00:38:33,562
You are not cool enough
to call something your house.

781
00:38:33,729 --> 00:38:36,732
Plus, we're outside, so it doesn't
even make sense. There's no house.

782
00:38:36,899 --> 00:38:38,859
- It's a metaphor, bitch.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Dude, dude.

783
00:38:39,026 --> 00:38:42,154
I'm sorry about my friend.
Look, we just talked to Nicole and...

784
00:38:42,321 --> 00:38:43,906
Whoa, you talked to my girl?

785
00:38:44,073 --> 00:38:45,574
Yeah, I wouldn't
have gone that route.

786
00:38:45,741 --> 00:38:47,576
Yeah, listen, we're just trying
to get our friend home

787
00:38:47,743 --> 00:38:49,662
and she said you might have
his address in your phone?

788
00:38:49,829 --> 00:38:51,914
- Nicole said that?
- Hm-mm.

789
00:38:52,081 --> 00:38:53,916
- Lock him up, Randy.
- Sweep the leg, Randy.

790
00:38:54,083 --> 00:38:55,709
"Sweep the leg"?

791
00:38:55,876 --> 00:38:58,420
- Hurt his feelings, Randy.
- Crush his spirit, Randy.

792
00:38:58,587 --> 00:39:01,549
Well, I mean, I should
probably help them out, right?

793
00:39:01,715 --> 00:39:03,217
(CHUCKLES)

794
00:39:03,384 --> 00:39:04,677
Here's my phone, motherfuckers.

795
00:39:05,803 --> 00:39:08,044
- Come and get it.
- Can we just be grown-ups about this?

796
00:39:08,097 --> 00:39:10,599
- OK, I'm done talking. What's up?
- Dude, what are you doing?

797
00:39:10,766 --> 00:39:12,446
- Oh, shit, Randy!
- He's got a gun, Randy!

798
00:39:12,518 --> 00:39:14,478
- I'm scared, Randy.
- Give me your fucking phone, Randy!

799
00:39:14,645 --> 00:39:17,606
- Put the fucking gun away, OK?
- No, dude, you know what? I know guns.

800
00:39:17,773 --> 00:39:19,775
- That shit ain't even real.
- Huh? Is this real?

801
00:39:19,942 --> 00:39:21,277
(GUNSHOT ECHOES)
(BELLOWING)

802
00:39:21,443 --> 00:39:23,445
(CROWD SCREAMING)

803
00:39:23,821 --> 00:39:26,448
(GRUNTING)
- Yeah, baby, kick his ass, Randy!

804
00:39:26,615 --> 00:39:30,077
- Yeah, boy! Fuck him up!
- Yeah, beat his ass, Randy!

805
00:39:30,244 --> 00:39:31,924
(OVERLAPPING SHOUTS)
- Break a leg, baby!

806
00:39:32,037 --> 00:39:33,497
(SNORTING)

807
00:39:34,915 --> 00:39:37,793
(GRUNTING)
(OVERLAPPING SHOUTS)

808
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:40,588
- Oh, shit, Randy.
(GROANING)

809
00:39:40,754 --> 00:39:41,922
I got it, I got the phone.

810
00:39:43,007 --> 00:39:45,885
- Pussies!
- Where the hell are you going?

811
00:39:46,051 --> 00:39:49,221
- Hey!
- Get up, Randy. Let's get him, Randy!

812
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:54,643
Move, move, get out the way!
Watch it!

813
00:39:55,895 --> 00:39:56,937
Fuck!

814
00:39:59,273 --> 00:40:02,568
(CROWD SCREAMING)
(BELLOWING)

815
00:40:03,777 --> 00:40:04,987
Fuck!

816
00:40:15,998 --> 00:40:18,125
There he is! I see him!

817
00:40:18,292 --> 00:40:19,627
(SNORTING)

818
00:40:20,961 --> 00:40:22,171
(WOMAN SCREAMS)

819
00:40:23,005 --> 00:40:24,173
Yeah, we got you now!

820
00:40:24,340 --> 00:40:25,382
You're cornered, dude!

821
00:40:25,549 --> 00:40:28,010
- We're gonna fuck up your face!
CASEY: - Miller!

822
00:40:29,178 --> 00:40:30,387
Get in, get in, get in!

823
00:40:30,554 --> 00:40:32,181
Hey! I'm in, I'm in!
Go, go, go!

824
00:40:36,685 --> 00:40:39,605
Find 'em? All right, go.
Look for them. Come on, I want...

825
00:40:39,772 --> 00:40:41,774
(SNORTING)
(SIREN WAILING)

826
00:40:45,527 --> 00:40:48,447
- That was so dumb. That was so dumb.
(CHUCKLING)

827
00:40:48,614 --> 00:40:51,454
This Randy guy's a massive douche,
but I actually really like his phone.

828
00:40:51,617 --> 00:40:53,702
Just tell me that Jeff Chang's
address is in there.

829
00:40:53,869 --> 00:40:56,372
OK, Jeffrey Reginald Chang.

830
00:40:56,538 --> 00:40:59,875
- Four-nineteen Oak Street, number two.
- Oh, thank God.

831
00:41:00,042 --> 00:41:04,546
And that is located... six blocks away.
And boom goes the dynamite.

832
00:41:04,713 --> 00:41:07,049
- Nice. Finally!
- Nice.

833
00:41:07,216 --> 00:41:09,093
Finally.
We're gonna get you home, buddy.

834
00:41:10,719 --> 00:41:13,013
- I'm glad we didn't ruin his life.
- He's still breathing, right?

835
00:41:13,180 --> 00:41:14,515
Who cares?
Oh, go straight here.

836
00:41:14,682 --> 00:41:17,122
CASEY: OK, so this is good.
We're gonna have him home by four.

837
00:41:17,142 --> 00:41:20,396
He'll be able to nap it out for
a few hours and be good to go by seven.

838
00:41:20,562 --> 00:41:22,231
His asshole father
will never know.

839
00:41:22,398 --> 00:41:24,900
(OPERA MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)

840
00:41:26,151 --> 00:41:27,987
(RINGTONE PLAYING)

841
00:41:28,153 --> 00:41:32,992
- Hello? Honey, I told you.
(WOMAN SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY)

842
00:41:33,158 --> 00:41:36,620
(SIGHS) I knocked on his door,
he didn't answer.

843
00:41:36,787 --> 00:41:38,467
I called his cell phone.
He didn't pick up.

844
00:41:38,497 --> 00:41:39,581
(INDISTINCT SHOUTS)

845
00:41:39,748 --> 00:41:41,750
- Oh, man, he's gonna pay for this.
<i>- Why didn't you wake him up?</i>

846
00:41:41,917 --> 00:41:46,296
(CHUCKLES) No, he's not asleep.
He's out here. I can feel it in my knee.

847
00:41:48,507 --> 00:41:50,592
So, what about that buffalo,
you think it's OK?

848
00:41:50,759 --> 00:41:52,344
- No, they're gonna kill it.
- Really?

849
00:41:52,511 --> 00:41:55,264
Buffalos only live for like
three years anyway, man.

850
00:41:55,431 --> 00:41:57,272
- Whoa! Was that The Chief again?
- Yes, it is.

851
00:41:57,349 --> 00:41:59,393
- Stay awesome, Chief!
(RAP SONG PLAYING)

852
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:00,602
Hey!

853
00:42:15,367 --> 00:42:17,286
(CHEERING)

854
00:42:17,453 --> 00:42:19,204
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

855
00:42:19,371 --> 00:42:21,248
- Oh, my God. Oh, God!
- Whoo-hoo!

856
00:42:21,415 --> 00:42:23,417
(LAUGHING) Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
- Whoo!

857
00:42:23,584 --> 00:42:25,252
MILLER: - Awesome.
- You were right, man.

858
00:42:25,419 --> 00:42:26,253
Golf carts go down stairs.

859
00:42:26,420 --> 00:42:29,423
Holy shit, I fucking love college, man.
I don't know why I ever left.

860
00:42:30,299 --> 00:42:31,467
Wait, what?

861
00:42:31,967 --> 00:42:33,052
What?

862
00:42:34,094 --> 00:42:36,180
Did you drop out of college?

863
00:42:36,346 --> 00:42:39,641
It's me, man. You can tell me whatever
you want. I'm not gonna make a big deal.

864
00:42:39,808 --> 00:42:41,643
- OK, yeah, I dropped out of college.
- What?

865
00:42:41,810 --> 00:42:43,103
- Two years ago.
- Two...

866
00:42:43,270 --> 00:42:45,111
What have you been doing
for fucking two years?

867
00:42:45,272 --> 00:42:47,649
I work at a gas station, man.

868
00:42:47,816 --> 00:42:50,360
I get, you know, free snacks.
I get free smokes.

869
00:42:50,527 --> 00:42:52,571
Like, I hang out
with my boy Varaj... Varag.

870
00:42:52,738 --> 00:42:54,156
You have a boy "Varaj"?

871
00:42:54,323 --> 00:42:56,658
- Yeah, he's pretty...
- This is... Oh, my God.

872
00:42:56,825 --> 00:42:59,203
Dude, look, Casey, I don't know why
you're acting so surprised, man.

873
00:42:59,369 --> 00:43:01,288
Like, I'm not Jeff Chang,
I'm not you.

874
00:43:01,455 --> 00:43:03,415
I wasn't gonna do
awesome stuff with my life.

875
00:43:03,582 --> 00:43:07,086
- Like... this is what's up.
- OK. What a cop-out.

876
00:43:07,252 --> 00:43:10,172
You're one of the smartest
people I've ever met.

877
00:43:10,339 --> 00:43:12,007
Really?

878
00:43:12,174 --> 00:43:14,343
- Top 25. Whatever, man.
(LAUGHS) Fuck you.

879
00:43:14,510 --> 00:43:17,221
- You aced your SAT's, right?
- Yeah.

880
00:43:17,387 --> 00:43:19,890
And remember Mary what's-her-name?
The hot born-again chick?

881
00:43:20,057 --> 00:43:21,100
No one could get near her,

882
00:43:21,266 --> 00:43:23,644
and then you stole third base
with her at the book fair.

883
00:43:23,811 --> 00:43:24,971
- She liked to read.
- I know.

884
00:43:24,978 --> 00:43:28,232
I don't know what you said to her,
but it must have been pretty smart.

885
00:43:28,398 --> 00:43:30,359
Uh... I told herl had leukemia.

886
00:43:31,527 --> 00:43:33,695
That's actually pretty dark.

887
00:43:33,862 --> 00:43:36,115
Whatever, man. The point is
you're really smart.

888
00:43:36,281 --> 00:43:38,909
- You're just lazy as fuck.
- Yeah.

889
00:43:39,076 --> 00:43:41,495
- I'm not bullshitting, man.
- I know, you're right.

890
00:43:41,662 --> 00:43:43,622
I just gotta get my shit
together, man.

891
00:43:43,789 --> 00:43:45,707
I just gotta get my shit together.

892
00:43:50,921 --> 00:43:52,047
I miss you, dude.

893
00:43:52,214 --> 00:43:55,592
We don't really get to talk
like this much anymore.

894
00:43:58,220 --> 00:44:00,472
Look, maybe I could take
a couple weeks off this summer

895
00:44:00,639 --> 00:44:02,766
and catch up with you guys
at the Sidewinder Festival.

896
00:44:02,933 --> 00:44:04,017
- Yeah?
- Yeah, man.

897
00:44:04,184 --> 00:44:06,270
- That's awesome, Casey!
- I miss you guys too.

898
00:44:06,436 --> 00:44:09,982
Dude, I'm gonna fuck so much unwashed
hippie ass it's gonna be embarrassing.

899
00:44:10,149 --> 00:44:12,029
(LAUGHS) Right.
- I like the hippie chicks, man.

900
00:44:12,109 --> 00:44:13,235
They don't shave their legs.

901
00:44:13,402 --> 00:44:15,154
That means they have
a huge bush and you know me...

902
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:17,823
- Yeah, you love bushes. Yeah.
- I like a good bush. Fuck.

903
00:44:17,990 --> 00:44:20,576
MILLER: OK, Jeff Chang's apartment
is right up here on the left.

904
00:44:20,742 --> 00:44:23,287
CASEY: 
Nice. We got you home, buddy.

905
00:44:23,453 --> 00:44:26,290
- This doesn't look right.
- What the shit is this?

906
00:44:26,456 --> 00:44:29,918
(RAP SONG PLAYING)

907
00:44:34,923 --> 00:44:37,676
- You sure this is the right address?
- Yeah.

908
00:44:37,843 --> 00:44:39,928
(SIGHS) Must be an old address.

909
00:44:40,929 --> 00:44:43,265
- Fuck.
- Fuck.

910
00:44:45,267 --> 00:44:46,907
All right, well, come on,
let's go inside.

911
00:44:46,935 --> 00:44:49,188
Maybe someone in his old room
knows where he lives now.

912
00:44:49,354 --> 00:44:51,857
(UP-TEMPO SONG PLAYING)

913
00:44:52,024 --> 00:44:54,234
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)

914
00:45:05,287 --> 00:45:07,039
(CHEERING)

915
00:45:07,831 --> 00:45:09,416
(LAUGHING, CHEERING)

916
00:45:11,293 --> 00:45:12,294
Jesus.

917
00:45:14,004 --> 00:45:15,380
Look at this place, man.

918
00:45:15,547 --> 00:45:18,008
MILLER: Yeah, these nerds
know how to party, bro!

919
00:45:18,175 --> 00:45:20,469
Oh, dude, Beer Pong?
We gotta play. We gotta play.

920
00:45:20,636 --> 00:45:22,956
Yeah, man. That would be great,
but we got some shit to do.

921
00:45:23,055 --> 00:45:24,556
Hey, your elbow's
over the table!

922
00:45:24,723 --> 00:45:26,475
- Shut up, you piece of shit!
- Hey, fuck you, man!

923
00:45:26,642 --> 00:45:28,522
- Watch your elbow, asshole!
- Thirty seconds...

924
00:45:28,644 --> 00:45:31,980
- I'm gonna kick that guy's ass!
CASEY: - Dude, what is wrong with you?

925
00:45:32,147 --> 00:45:35,150
(MUSIC ECHOING IN DISTANCE)

926
00:45:38,028 --> 00:45:41,281
- Oh, my God. You are so cute.
- Hello. Oh, my God.

927
00:45:41,448 --> 00:45:44,201
Bang on my door one more fucking time
and I'll claw your fucking eyes out.

928
00:45:44,368 --> 00:45:45,661
- What?
- Whoa.

929
00:45:45,827 --> 00:45:47,704
OK, um... Do you know this guy?

930
00:45:47,871 --> 00:45:49,164
Why, because I'm Asian?

931
00:45:49,331 --> 00:45:51,458
We don't all know each other,
you racist mother...

932
00:45:51,625 --> 00:45:54,544
Oh, wait, I do know this guy.
Yeah, he used to live here.

933
00:45:54,711 --> 00:45:56,755
Do you know where he lives now?

934
00:45:56,922 --> 00:45:59,258
No, I used to live across the hall
and he never talked to anyone.

935
00:45:59,424 --> 00:46:00,384
Of course he didn't.

936
00:46:00,550 --> 00:46:03,053
That's why I was shocked when the cops
came and arrested his bitch ass.

937
00:46:03,220 --> 00:46:04,388
Wait, what?

938
00:46:04,554 --> 00:46:06,514
What would the cops
possibly want with Jeff Chang?

939
00:46:06,515 --> 00:46:10,811
I don't fucking know, but he moved out
after that and I never saw him again.

940
00:46:10,978 --> 00:46:13,355
What is going on with Jeff Chang?

941
00:46:13,522 --> 00:46:15,190
Motherfucker took
my laundry detergent.

942
00:46:15,357 --> 00:46:18,694
He's packing heat, he's failing out
of school, and now he's a criminal?

943
00:46:18,860 --> 00:46:21,900
Maybe he's a Yakuza or something. This
chick is really fucking turning me on.

944
00:46:21,905 --> 00:46:24,408
Do you have a forwarding address
for Jeff Chang?

945
00:46:24,574 --> 00:46:27,995
Yeah, yeah, no, I do.
No, you fucking cock lickers.

946
00:46:28,161 --> 00:46:29,841
You could check with our RA.
He might know.

947
00:46:29,955 --> 00:46:33,417
- Your RA, where is your RA? Miller!
- What, the fuck...

948
00:46:33,583 --> 00:46:36,545
Top floor. His name is PJ Brill
and he's throwing this fucking party

949
00:46:36,712 --> 00:46:37,752
if you could believe that.

950
00:46:37,838 --> 00:46:39,798
- She has such a mouth on her.
- I believe it. I believe it.

951
00:46:39,965 --> 00:46:41,605
Yeah, and when you see
the beaver muncher,

952
00:46:41,633 --> 00:46:44,219
tell him to get all the titties
and butt-fuckers out of my foyer.

953
00:46:44,386 --> 00:46:46,555
I got fucking field hockey tomorrow.

954
00:46:47,055 --> 00:46:49,182
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)

955
00:46:50,225 --> 00:46:52,185
- Oh, here we go.
MAN: - Whoa, whoa, whoa.

956
00:46:52,352 --> 00:46:54,646
- Where do you think you're going?
- We're going up.

957
00:46:54,813 --> 00:46:56,982
- No way. Tower of Power, dude.
MILLER: - What?

958
00:46:57,149 --> 00:46:58,692
- What's the Tower of Power?
- Yeah.

959
00:46:58,859 --> 00:47:01,903
You gotta win the event on each
floor to move up a level. Hey.

960
00:47:02,070 --> 00:47:04,156
CASEY: - You have to be kidding me.
- Nope.

961
00:47:04,323 --> 00:47:06,450
- OK, how many levels are there?
- There's eight.

962
00:47:06,616 --> 00:47:09,453
OK, we just need to talk
to this guy named PJ Brill?

963
00:47:09,619 --> 00:47:11,455
PJ Brill is Tower Master.

964
00:47:11,621 --> 00:47:14,499
You wanna talk to him,
you gotta get to the top level.

965
00:47:14,666 --> 00:47:16,501
How do big dumb animals
like you even get into college?

966
00:47:16,668 --> 00:47:19,963
Just 'cause I look like this...
doesn't mean I don't have feelings.

967
00:47:21,131 --> 00:47:23,258
Look, we just need
to get our friend home, OK?

968
00:47:23,425 --> 00:47:25,635
- Can you help us out? Please?
- Come on, man.

969
00:47:25,802 --> 00:47:26,970
Tower of Power, dude.

970
00:47:28,096 --> 00:47:29,848
- Tower of Power, dude?
- Tower of Power.

971
00:47:30,015 --> 00:47:31,433
CASEY: What are we gonna
do with Jeff Chang?

972
00:47:31,600 --> 00:47:33,352
Uh...

973
00:47:33,518 --> 00:47:35,187
Oh, stoners.

974
00:47:37,147 --> 00:47:39,149
- Hey, what's up, dudes?
- What's going on?

975
00:47:39,316 --> 00:47:41,036
You guys mind watching
our friend for a bit?

976
00:47:41,193 --> 00:47:44,154
Sure, man.
(COUGHING) Killer.

977
00:47:44,321 --> 00:47:47,783
These guys look super high.
You sure this is a good idea?

978
00:47:47,949 --> 00:47:50,077
Relax, dude, these morons
aren't going anywhere.

979
00:47:50,243 --> 00:47:52,643
Now, come on! Let's show these
clown dicks how to pong, baby.

980
00:47:52,662 --> 00:47:54,289
- Fuck, yeah!
- Fuck, yeah!

981
00:47:54,456 --> 00:47:57,292
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

982
00:48:16,269 --> 00:48:19,147
Ethnic Serbs.
These guys can pong.

983
00:48:19,314 --> 00:48:22,025
Fuck the Balkan states.
OK, bros, when we beat you,

984
00:48:22,192 --> 00:48:26,154
you can't rape us and steal our land,
OK? No rapey. No rapey.

985
00:48:27,656 --> 00:48:28,782
OK. Nice shot.

986
00:48:29,491 --> 00:48:30,367
Mazel tov.

987
00:48:34,371 --> 00:48:36,039
Fucking Serbs.

988
00:48:37,207 --> 00:48:38,291
Here we go.

989
00:48:39,209 --> 00:48:40,460
And we're back!

990
00:48:40,627 --> 00:48:41,795
Twinkle, twinkle, baby.
Twinkle, twinkle.

991
00:48:41,962 --> 00:48:42,963
- Good.
- Drink up, Serb.

992
00:48:43,130 --> 00:48:44,756
Know what that tastes like?
Freedom.

993
00:48:45,507 --> 00:48:46,758
BOTH: Yeah!

994
00:48:46,925 --> 00:48:49,803
Hey, Ivan Drago, this one's
for you and your sweet jumpsuit.

995
00:48:49,970 --> 00:48:51,972
Ahh! Sucka.

996
00:48:52,139 --> 00:48:53,819
Say something, bro.
You're freaking me out.

997
00:48:53,932 --> 00:48:56,351
This one's for Apollo Creed.
His spirit lives on.

998
00:48:57,686 --> 00:48:58,937
CASEY: - Yeah!
- That's what I'm talking about!

999
00:48:59,104 --> 00:49:01,464
- That's what I'm talking about!
- Paper covers rock, bitch.

1000
00:49:01,481 --> 00:49:04,901
- Rock covers your Russian ass!
- That's right... different cultures.

1001
00:49:06,361 --> 00:49:07,529
Sky hook.

1002
00:49:09,364 --> 00:49:10,407
That's unbelievable!

1003
00:49:10,574 --> 00:49:13,493
- Last shot, last shot.
- Kiss it. Kiss it.

1004
00:49:19,624 --> 00:49:20,584
Yeah!

1005
00:49:20,750 --> 00:49:22,419
That's unbelievable!

1006
00:49:22,586 --> 00:49:24,129
BOTH: USA! USA!

1007
00:49:24,296 --> 00:49:25,936
- Red, white and blue!
- Undefeated, baby!

1008
00:49:26,047 --> 00:49:28,383
- Give me my beads, bitch!
- Sorry, he doesn't mean that.

1009
00:49:28,550 --> 00:49:30,302
- Tower of fucking Power!
(RAP SONG PLAYS)

1010
00:49:30,469 --> 00:49:33,263
All day! (INDISTINCT)

1011
00:49:36,057 --> 00:49:39,227
That's right, baby!
You did it. You know you did it.

1012
00:49:45,567 --> 00:49:47,319
- Yes!
(ALL CHEERING)

1013
00:49:52,115 --> 00:49:54,451
- What's the name of the game?
ALL: - Thumper!

1014
00:49:54,618 --> 00:49:57,829
- And why do we play?
- To get fucked up!

1015
00:50:03,460 --> 00:50:04,294
Yeah!

1016
00:50:07,130 --> 00:50:10,133
(ALL SHOUTING)

1017
00:50:10,300 --> 00:50:12,677
- Yeah!
- Give me my beads.

1018
00:50:12,844 --> 00:50:15,055
(RAP SONG CONTINUES)

1019
00:50:19,184 --> 00:50:20,864
That's what I'm talking about,
right there!

1020
00:50:21,937 --> 00:50:23,271
Dude, what?

1021
00:50:29,444 --> 00:50:32,656
CROWD: (CHANTING)
Chug, chug, chug, chug!

1022
00:50:34,533 --> 00:50:35,617
(SPUTTERING)

1023
00:50:38,620 --> 00:50:40,872
Almost there!
Holy shit! You can do this!

1024
00:50:41,039 --> 00:50:43,625
(CHEERING)

1025
00:50:43,792 --> 00:50:44,960
No.

1026
00:50:54,219 --> 00:50:56,471
- Suck and Blow!
- Fucking child's play.

1027
00:50:56,638 --> 00:50:58,348
CASEY: All right, last event,
get in line.

1028
00:50:58,515 --> 00:51:01,309
I'm gonna go get in there.
Let's go, Suck and Blow party.

1029
00:51:02,477 --> 00:51:03,645
NICOLE: Casey?

1030
00:51:05,021 --> 00:51:06,064
Nicole?

1031
00:51:06,231 --> 00:51:08,984
- Oh, so this was your party.
- Hey.

1032
00:51:09,150 --> 00:51:11,194
- Did you get Jeff home OK?
- Uh, no, actually,

1033
00:51:11,361 --> 00:51:13,405
we left him downstairs
with a couple random stoners.

1034
00:51:13,572 --> 00:51:16,449
(GIGGLES)
Wait, are you serious?

1035
00:51:16,616 --> 00:51:18,827
Yeah, actually, now that I think
about it, it's kind of a horrible idea.

1036
00:51:18,994 --> 00:51:19,911
(LAUGHS)
- I don't know why we did that.

1037
00:51:20,078 --> 00:51:22,831
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS)

1038
00:51:26,001 --> 00:51:28,378
- Hey, Walsh.
- Yeah, bro?

1039
00:51:28,545 --> 00:51:30,672
Hey, man, who's this dude?

1040
00:51:34,217 --> 00:51:35,594
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)

1041
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:37,846
So, Randy didn't
have Jeff's address?

1042
00:51:38,013 --> 00:51:40,932
Yeah, no, your boyfriend actually
turned out to be a bit of a dead end.

1043
00:51:41,099 --> 00:51:42,309
Balls, I'm sorry.

1044
00:51:42,475 --> 00:51:44,561
Can I ask you what
you see in that guy?

1045
00:51:44,728 --> 00:51:46,396
- Is this you being jealous?
- No!

1046
00:51:46,563 --> 00:51:47,856
- Is that what that is?
- I'm not jealous.

1047
00:51:48,023 --> 00:51:49,743
(LAUGHS) Yes, you are.
- Why am I jealous?

1048
00:51:49,858 --> 00:51:54,279
Why, 'cause he's handsome
and has phenomenal school spirit?

1049
00:51:54,446 --> 00:51:57,365
Randy is pretty crazy,
but he's also fun.

1050
00:51:57,532 --> 00:51:59,534
And he's passionate
and I like that in a guy.

1051
00:51:59,701 --> 00:52:02,912
Yeah, but he's passionate about
cheerleading and fighting people.

1052
00:52:03,079 --> 00:52:05,248
It's like the two worst things
to be passionate about.

1053
00:52:05,415 --> 00:52:08,460
OK, all right, what are you
passionate about, Casey?

1054
00:52:12,130 --> 00:52:15,050
- I'm passionate about a lot of things.
- Oh, what NPR?

1055
00:52:15,216 --> 00:52:19,387
Yeah, yeah, I actually like NPR a bit.
They have a nice little Morning Edition,

1056
00:52:19,554 --> 00:52:21,056
sometimes I get some
cooking tips from them.

1057
00:52:21,222 --> 00:52:23,350
(RINGTONE PLAYING)

1058
00:52:23,516 --> 00:52:24,726
- Cute ring-tone.
- Sorry.

1059
00:52:24,893 --> 00:52:26,394
I thought that
might have been him.

1060
00:52:26,561 --> 00:52:30,357
He hasn't returned my texts all night.
I... hate it when he does this.

1061
00:52:31,483 --> 00:52:33,735
Well, enough about Randy.

1062
00:52:33,902 --> 00:52:35,463
Would you like
to Suck and Blow with me?

1063
00:52:35,612 --> 00:52:37,739
I thought you'd never ask.

1064
00:52:38,239 --> 00:52:40,116
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC CONTINUES)
(MEN CHUCKLE)

1065
00:52:42,535 --> 00:52:45,038
Dude, does it look
like the bear's...

1066
00:52:45,205 --> 00:52:49,584
- ...blowing him enough yet or what?
- It looks great, I believe it.

1067
00:52:49,751 --> 00:52:54,756
What about the face...
Should I write, "Douchebag"?

1068
00:52:54,923 --> 00:52:58,593
Or "Fucktard"? Huh?

1069
00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,929
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

1070
00:53:03,598 --> 00:53:05,016
(LAUGHS)

1071
00:53:05,183 --> 00:53:08,436
Very nice form.
Where did you learn to play?

1072
00:53:08,603 --> 00:53:10,271
Hanover Lake every summer.

1073
00:53:10,438 --> 00:53:12,358
No way, I used to spend
every winter break there.

1074
00:53:12,524 --> 00:53:13,858
- No!
- I swear to God.

1075
00:53:15,985 --> 00:53:18,425
The card needs to be a little
higher, Danielle. For next time.

1076
00:53:18,488 --> 00:53:21,282
Yeah, people say that
it's like old and run down,

1077
00:53:21,449 --> 00:53:23,410
but I think it's the most
beautiful place in the world.

1078
00:53:23,576 --> 00:53:26,121
Yes! Well, except for that
creepy guy that sells pinecones.

1079
00:53:26,287 --> 00:53:28,748
- Creepy Dan the Pinecone Man!
- Yes! Oh, my God!

1080
00:53:30,750 --> 00:53:32,168
I can tell you don't like me,
but if you have a sister

1081
00:53:32,335 --> 00:53:33,837
who looks like you...

1082
00:53:35,088 --> 00:53:36,840
I can't believe that
you know Hanover Lake.

1083
00:53:37,006 --> 00:53:38,800
It is literally
my favorite place on earth.

1084
00:53:38,967 --> 00:53:41,511
It's like, all you need
to know about me.

1085
00:53:41,678 --> 00:53:44,597
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.

1086
00:53:46,975 --> 00:53:49,415
Jesus Christ, we're playing
Suck and Blow, people. Game faces.

1087
00:53:49,477 --> 00:53:50,937
(RINGTONE PLAYING)

1088
00:53:53,189 --> 00:53:55,817
Oh, God.
Randy's in the hospital.

1089
00:53:55,984 --> 00:53:58,236
He got mauled
by a fucking buffalo.

1090
00:53:58,403 --> 00:54:01,406
Some asshole stole his phone.
That's why he hasn't texted.

1091
00:54:01,573 --> 00:54:05,160
- Oh, my God, I'm such a bitch.
- Do you want me to come with you?

1092
00:54:05,326 --> 00:54:07,412
Probably not, right?

1093
00:54:08,496 --> 00:54:09,622
All right, bye.

1094
00:54:12,959 --> 00:54:14,169
Let her go, man.

1095
00:54:14,335 --> 00:54:16,504
Sometimes the heart
is a lonely hunter.

1096
00:54:18,173 --> 00:54:21,468
Do you want to cry?
I'll fucking cry for you.

1097
00:54:23,011 --> 00:54:24,763
Do you want to make out with me?

1098
00:54:24,929 --> 00:54:26,473
No? Kenny, you can come too.

1099
00:54:27,599 --> 00:54:29,100
You look like a watcher.

1100
00:54:31,936 --> 00:54:33,688
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING)

1101
00:54:34,606 --> 00:54:36,357
(MOANS)

1102
00:54:36,524 --> 00:54:37,901
He's waking up, dude.

1103
00:54:38,067 --> 00:54:40,153
I can't just leave it.
It says "DOUCHEBA"...

1104
00:54:40,320 --> 00:54:42,447
- No one's gonna get it.
- The public will understand.

1105
00:54:42,614 --> 00:54:44,741
- This is my art.
- Stop being such a diva.

1106
00:54:44,908 --> 00:54:46,534
(GIGGLING)

1107
00:54:46,701 --> 00:54:49,037
Fuck, dude... we gotta go!

1108
00:54:52,791 --> 00:54:54,334
What the fuck?

1109
00:54:58,838 --> 00:55:01,132
MILLER: 
Top floor, baby, top floor!

1110
00:55:01,299 --> 00:55:03,551
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS)

1111
00:55:03,718 --> 00:55:06,179
- What the hell is this?
MILLER: - Holy shit.

1112
00:55:06,346 --> 00:55:08,547
- What is this place?
CASEY: - OK, shit just got weird.

1113
00:55:08,640 --> 00:55:11,226
Congratulations, players.

1114
00:55:11,392 --> 00:55:13,436
You've completed
the Tower of Power.

1115
00:55:13,603 --> 00:55:17,232
- You PJ Brill?
- Please, call me Tower Master.

1116
00:55:17,398 --> 00:55:18,900
These are my sweet bitches.

1117
00:55:19,067 --> 00:55:21,569
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- What's up, sweet bitches?

1118
00:55:21,736 --> 00:55:25,990
- Look, we're friends with Jeff Chang...
- Now, here is your reward.

1119
00:55:27,367 --> 00:55:29,869
Gold beads?
You gotta be kidding me, dude.

1120
00:55:30,036 --> 00:55:31,704
All right, are you fucking serious, man?

1121
00:55:31,871 --> 00:55:33,311
I want more than gold fucking beads.

1122
00:55:33,331 --> 00:55:35,375
Miller, it's not
about the beads, man.

1123
00:55:35,542 --> 00:55:37,335
They gave me 50 bucks
for this whole party, all right?

1124
00:55:37,502 --> 00:55:39,879
Fifty bucks!
The chair, it was 40! All right?

1125
00:55:40,046 --> 00:55:41,881
These chicks, I'm paying them
five bucks each tonight.

1126
00:55:42,048 --> 00:55:43,568
So maybe you guys
could cut me a break.

1127
00:55:43,591 --> 00:55:45,593
Maybe he can cut us a break
'cause I just chugged a gallon of milk.

1128
00:55:45,760 --> 00:55:48,054
Went through your little rat race.
I'm all excited, get to the top floor

1129
00:55:48,221 --> 00:55:49,582
and look what I got, look at this.

1130
00:55:49,639 --> 00:55:51,683
I have a baby wizard Elvis
with gold beads.

1131
00:55:51,850 --> 00:55:54,185
I'm sorry you got free booze
and free milk. Shit!

1132
00:55:54,352 --> 00:55:56,855
My fault, buddy! OK, do you know
how much milk costs?

1133
00:55:57,021 --> 00:55:59,274
- Like, it's more than gasoline.
- We're friends with Jeff Chang...

1134
00:55:59,440 --> 00:56:02,777
Hey, can I get my banana? These dudes
are like stressing me. Thanks.

1135
00:56:04,445 --> 00:56:07,448
- OK, who are we talking about?
- Jeff Chang. He used to live here.

1136
00:56:07,615 --> 00:56:08,950
You were his RA.
The cops came in here...

1137
00:56:09,117 --> 00:56:10,493
Oh, yeah, yeah!

1138
00:56:10,660 --> 00:56:13,371
He got super wasted and we're
just trying to get him home.

1139
00:56:13,538 --> 00:56:15,618
No, I don't know where
that little psycho lives, man.

1140
00:56:15,707 --> 00:56:17,587
Why you calling him a psycho?
What's that about?

1141
00:56:17,625 --> 00:56:19,786
Dude, the guy got arrested
for attempted murder, right?

1142
00:56:19,794 --> 00:56:21,337
BOTH: - What?
- Yeah, that's fucking psycho, right?

1143
00:56:21,504 --> 00:56:24,132
- Murder? Are you kidding me?
- Bullshit. Who did he try to kill?

1144
00:56:24,299 --> 00:56:26,659
I don't know, but he had a gun
and he fucking used it, dude.

1145
00:56:26,801 --> 00:56:28,803
- That doesn't make any sense.
- Yeah. Right?

1146
00:56:28,970 --> 00:56:30,972
You know, the boy's a little nuts.

1147
00:56:32,724 --> 00:56:34,100
Coming from a man in a diaper,
eating a banana.

1148
00:56:34,267 --> 00:56:35,977
OK, I get it.

1149
00:56:36,144 --> 00:56:38,980
I might not look
like your average dude. OK?

1150
00:56:39,147 --> 00:56:40,356
MILLER: - That's for sure.
- But I've got bitches

1151
00:56:40,523 --> 00:56:43,484
and I've got goblets and
I wake up in the morning happy.

1152
00:56:43,651 --> 00:56:44,986
CASEY: - Miller...
- Your nipples are just

1153
00:56:45,153 --> 00:56:47,238
- looking right at me.
- What the fuck, man?

1154
00:56:47,405 --> 00:56:49,073
- Uh, thanks for nothing.
- OK.

1155
00:56:49,240 --> 00:56:50,700
- PJ Brill, you fucking weirdo.
CASEY: - Let's get out of here.

1156
00:56:50,867 --> 00:56:52,327
Have some beer, have some milk.

1157
00:56:52,493 --> 00:56:55,705
I'll try to get iPods for you guys
next time. That'd be great, right?

1158
00:56:55,872 --> 00:56:58,166
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING)
- This is bullshit.

1159
00:56:58,333 --> 00:57:00,960
You don't think Jeff Chang
actually tried to kill someone, do you?

1160
00:57:01,127 --> 00:57:04,797
No, I don't. I think Jeff Chang is fine.
I think everything is fine.

1161
00:57:04,964 --> 00:57:08,843
- Look at that asshole.
- Yeah, what an idiot.

1162
00:57:09,010 --> 00:57:11,512
- Wait. Is that Jeff Chang?
MILLER: - What is he wearing?

1163
00:57:11,679 --> 00:57:12,931
CASEY: 
Oh, my God, he's drinking again.

1164
00:57:13,097 --> 00:57:14,557
- Fuck me!
- Move.

1165
00:57:14,724 --> 00:57:17,393
- Jeff Chang! We're coming!
- Put the bottle down, buddy!

1166
00:57:17,894 --> 00:57:20,396
(UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING)
(CROWD CHATTERING)

1167
00:57:21,522 --> 00:57:24,525
- Yeah! (LAUGHING)
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)

1168
00:57:24,692 --> 00:57:27,612
Mommy, look at me dance!
Look at me dance!

1169
00:57:28,613 --> 00:57:30,198
Look at me dance!

1170
00:57:31,240 --> 00:57:34,243
- Holy shit!
- Oh, my God.

1171
00:57:35,286 --> 00:57:36,579
Suck my dick, bear!

1172
00:57:36,746 --> 00:57:39,415
Suck my motherfucking dick, bear!

1173
00:57:40,041 --> 00:57:42,669
Yeah! (LAUGHING)

1174
00:57:42,835 --> 00:57:45,254
Hey, chipmunk, hey,
I'm one of the good guys.

1175
00:57:45,421 --> 00:57:47,215
We're gonna get you
some clothes, OK?

1176
00:57:47,382 --> 00:57:48,549
It's all gonna be OK.

1177
00:57:49,801 --> 00:57:51,177
You'll never catch me alive.

1178
00:57:51,344 --> 00:57:53,304
(MANIACAL LAUGHTER)

1179
00:57:53,846 --> 00:57:54,847
Ah, fuck!

1180
00:57:57,225 --> 00:57:59,018
- Fuck!
(UP-TEMPO SONG PLAYING)

1181
00:58:00,561 --> 00:58:02,689
(SHRIEKING)
- I'm gonna kick his ass!

1182
00:58:02,855 --> 00:58:05,858
We're not gonna kick your ass!
We do need you to come back, though!

1183
00:58:10,279 --> 00:58:13,074
(LAUGHING, SHRIEKING)

1184
00:58:22,583 --> 00:58:26,796
(CAR ALARMS BLARING)

1185
00:58:28,006 --> 00:58:29,507
(SCREECHING)

1186
00:58:32,510 --> 00:58:34,929
(POLICE SIREN CHIRPS)
- Whoo!

1187
00:58:36,180 --> 00:58:38,474
Oh, shit! Lookit...

1188
00:58:38,641 --> 00:58:41,894
- It's the big bad po-po!
- Get down, sir.

1189
00:58:42,061 --> 00:58:44,522
Get down immediately.

1190
00:58:46,774 --> 00:58:49,110
- What are you doing, sir?
- I think he's getting down.

1191
00:58:49,277 --> 00:58:51,154
- Yeah, I know, I see that.
- I'm just saying, technically,

1192
00:58:51,320 --> 00:58:53,656
he's doing what you asked him to do.

1193
00:58:55,199 --> 00:58:56,534
What the fuck?

1194
00:58:56,701 --> 00:58:58,244
OK, sir,
please remove yourself...

1195
00:58:58,411 --> 00:59:00,371
- He's our friend!
(TIRES SCREECHING)

1196
00:59:00,538 --> 00:59:01,706
What the hell is this?

1197
00:59:02,832 --> 00:59:04,500
- Dr. Chang! Hi. What are you...
- Hey.

1198
00:59:04,667 --> 00:59:07,003
- It's so good to see you, man!
- Great to see you.

1199
00:59:07,170 --> 00:59:09,964
(OPERA MUSIC PLAYING IN CAR)
- Where's my son?

1200
00:59:11,424 --> 00:59:13,926
He's home. He's in bed.
He's sleeping.

1201
00:59:14,552 --> 00:59:17,513
- Why don't I believe you?
- Because you're suspicious and mean?

1202
00:59:18,431 --> 00:59:20,641
- I'm sorry.
- Yeah, touch my fucking ass, dude!

1203
00:59:20,808 --> 00:59:23,144
- Come on! OK. OK.
(JEFFCHANG LAUGHING)

1204
00:59:23,311 --> 00:59:26,606
Hey! Why are you asking
about Jeffrey? ls everything OK?

1205
00:59:26,773 --> 00:59:29,776
I have reason to believe that
the three of you have been out drinking.

1206
00:59:29,942 --> 00:59:34,864
What? No. We put Jeff to bed
at like nine o'clock, right, Miller?

1207
00:59:35,031 --> 00:59:37,992
Yeah, we watched <i>Cold Case,</i>
made paninis and then went to bed.

1208
00:59:38,159 --> 00:59:41,329
Yeah, then Miller and I came out
for a drink, or nine. (LAUGHS)

1209
00:59:41,496 --> 00:59:44,165
What? (LAUGHS)

1210
00:59:46,042 --> 00:59:48,044
Your parents must be
so proud of you.

1211
00:59:48,211 --> 00:59:49,879
- Get him!
- Free OJ!

1212
00:59:50,046 --> 00:59:51,756
- Free the dolphins!
- Hm...!

1213
00:59:52,757 --> 00:59:54,133
Fuck you, cop!

1214
00:59:54,300 --> 00:59:55,760
(WHISPERS) Oh, my God.
- Fuck.

1215
00:59:55,927 --> 00:59:58,471
Oh, you kids today.

1216
00:59:58,638 --> 01:00:01,891
Every one of you is spoiled,
drunk and fat!

1217
01:00:02,058 --> 01:00:04,602
- Oh, my God, right?
- Thank you, sir.

1218
01:00:04,769 --> 01:00:05,770
- Appreciate it.
CASEY: - Look.

1219
01:00:05,937 --> 01:00:07,563
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)

1220
01:00:07,730 --> 01:00:10,358
- Miller, look.
- Fuck that!

1221
01:00:16,364 --> 01:00:18,366
(CRICKETS CHIRRING)

1222
01:00:33,089 --> 01:00:36,008
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- Here are tonight's winners.

1223
01:00:36,175 --> 01:00:38,177
(BABBLING)

1224
01:00:40,721 --> 01:00:41,848
(SHOUTING)

1225
01:00:42,515 --> 01:00:43,766
Jesus.

1226
01:00:43,933 --> 01:00:46,727
CASEY: I feel like someone
should break those two up, right?

1227
01:00:46,894 --> 01:00:48,729
Do you see your friend or what?

1228
01:00:48,896 --> 01:00:51,732
No, is there anywhere else
you might have taken him?

1229
01:00:51,899 --> 01:00:54,610
- Jeffrey Reginald Chang?
- Yeah.

1230
01:00:54,777 --> 01:00:56,612
- Ooh...
- What? What is it?

1231
01:00:56,779 --> 01:00:58,531
They've taken him
to Health Services.

1232
01:00:59,824 --> 01:01:02,493
- What does that mean?
- I wouldn't want to speculate.

1233
01:01:02,660 --> 01:01:04,745
Look, I'm sure he's OK.

1234
01:01:04,912 --> 01:01:07,123
No, he's not OK, Miller.
He could be in a coma.

1235
01:01:07,290 --> 01:01:08,875
- You understand that?
- No, yeah. Absolutely.

1236
01:01:09,041 --> 01:01:10,418
All right, how do we get
to Health Services?

1237
01:01:10,585 --> 01:01:12,420
- You're gonna wanna go...
- I can take you.

1238
01:01:12,587 --> 01:01:13,963
Who are you? Why is
she wearing an orange vest?

1239
01:01:14,130 --> 01:01:16,382
I'm Cara.
I'm a campus security escort.

1240
01:01:16,549 --> 01:01:18,259
- Why don't you come with me?
- Of course you are.

1241
01:01:18,426 --> 01:01:20,136
- I will come with you. Casey.
- What?

1242
01:01:20,303 --> 01:01:22,889
- She's an escort. Whatever.
- She not that kind of escort.

1243
01:01:23,055 --> 01:01:25,766
No, I love the name Cara.
In fact, my mother's name is Cara.

1244
01:01:25,933 --> 01:01:27,853
Your mother's name is Beth.
Everybody knows that.

1245
01:01:28,019 --> 01:01:29,812
Yeah, but I call her Cara,
sometimes.

1246
01:01:29,979 --> 01:01:33,024
But, Cara, where are
your people from? Italy?

1247
01:01:33,191 --> 01:01:34,734
- Mexico.
- Latinas.

1248
01:01:34,901 --> 01:01:36,502
- Whoa... ladies...
- Whoa, whoa, whoa...

1249
01:01:36,611 --> 01:01:39,071
A lot of Latinas.
Ladies, let's just talk about this.

1250
01:01:43,409 --> 01:01:45,369
(WHISPERS) What the fuck?
- What the fuck, dude?

1251
01:01:45,453 --> 01:01:48,414
MILLER: - Where the fuck are we?
CASEY: - I don't like this.

1252
01:01:48,581 --> 01:01:51,500
- What are you freaks looking at?
- Why are we here?

1253
01:01:51,667 --> 01:01:54,253
- What the fuck is going on right now?
- I don't want to be here.

1254
01:01:54,420 --> 01:01:57,215
- Why aren't you guys saying anything?
- Holy shit, dude.

1255
01:01:57,381 --> 01:01:59,675
- We are shackled.
- Why are we shackled?

1256
01:01:59,842 --> 01:02:00,968
Why are you wearing
a fucking tube sock?

1257
01:02:01,135 --> 01:02:02,303
Why are you wearing a sock?

1258
01:02:02,470 --> 01:02:04,764
- They match. Whose socks are these?
- We are so fucked.

1259
01:02:04,931 --> 01:02:07,225
WOMAN: 
Welcome to the Tribunal of Justice.

1260
01:02:07,391 --> 01:02:08,517
What?

1261
01:02:08,684 --> 01:02:12,521
WOMAN: These two men stand accused
of infiltrating our sacred home,

1262
01:02:12,688 --> 01:02:14,815
violating the dignity
of two of our pledges,

1263
01:02:14,982 --> 01:02:18,069
and destroying
our award-winning rose garden.

1264
01:02:18,236 --> 01:02:19,528
Look, if I could just respond
to all that...

1265
01:02:19,695 --> 01:02:22,782
- What sayest the sisterhood?
ALL: - Guilty as charged!

1266
01:02:22,949 --> 01:02:25,534
MILLER: OK, look,
in our country, America,

1267
01:02:25,701 --> 01:02:27,902
usually there's like a trial
and some evidence and shit!

1268
01:02:27,912 --> 01:02:30,498
- You're not just guilty.
- The punishment shall match the crime.

1269
01:02:30,665 --> 01:02:32,959
The aggrieved may enter
the circle of vengeance.

1270
01:02:33,125 --> 01:02:36,879
The circle of what? Hold on.
Holy shit, look who it is.

1271
01:02:37,046 --> 01:02:39,840
Holy shit, these chicks
are gonna tear us up.

1272
01:02:40,007 --> 01:02:42,885
WOMAN: - Assume the position.
- Wait, actually, you know what?

1273
01:02:43,052 --> 01:02:45,972
I didn't even spank them.
That was all him. I wasn't even...

1274
01:02:46,138 --> 01:02:47,807
- What are you...?
- Fuck you, dude. I'm sorry.

1275
01:02:47,974 --> 01:02:49,809
Punishment grows more severe
every second you delay.

1276
01:02:49,976 --> 01:02:52,228
- Ready, sister?
- Ready.

1277
01:02:55,773 --> 01:02:57,024
WOMAN: Assume the position.

1278
01:02:58,067 --> 01:03:00,444
- OK, OK, OK.
- Oh, my God.

1279
01:03:02,238 --> 01:03:04,949
OK, Chantelle, I have a rare
skin condition on my upper thighs,

1280
01:03:05,116 --> 01:03:06,617
so if you could
just avoid that area.

1281
01:03:06,784 --> 01:03:09,036
- Oh, yeah, totally.
- Thanks, Chantelle.

1282
01:03:09,203 --> 01:03:10,683
I'll totally watch it while I just...

1283
01:03:10,746 --> 01:03:13,082
Oh, my God, holy shit!

1284
01:03:13,249 --> 01:03:15,459
- Oh, my God!
BOTH: - Ow! Ow!

1285
01:03:15,626 --> 01:03:17,867
CASEY: You just had to fuck
with these girls, didn't you?

1286
01:03:18,004 --> 01:03:19,422
(WOMEN CHUCKLING)
- Holy shit!

1287
01:03:19,588 --> 01:03:21,674
Yeah, when a lady asks you to spank
her ass, you spank that ass!

1288
01:03:21,841 --> 01:03:24,593
Oh, great. You know what?
You are fucking unbelievable, man!

1289
01:03:24,760 --> 01:03:27,096
- It's called having manners, Casey!
- Fuck my face!

1290
01:03:27,263 --> 01:03:29,223
Enough. Turn around.

1291
01:03:30,599 --> 01:03:32,601
CASEY: It hurts. It hurts.

1292
01:03:33,185 --> 01:03:34,228
It hurts.

1293
01:03:35,646 --> 01:03:38,024
Look, Goat Mask Lady...

1294
01:03:38,190 --> 01:03:39,650
Please.

1295
01:03:39,817 --> 01:03:42,278
- I mean, like, we're really sorry.
- Yeah.

1296
01:03:42,445 --> 01:03:44,238
We're just trying to get
our friend Jeff Chang home.

1297
01:03:44,405 --> 01:03:46,490
- Justice has been served...
- Oh, thank God.

1298
01:03:46,657 --> 01:03:47,825
...for the first offense.

1299
01:03:47,992 --> 01:03:50,828
- What?
- To address the second offense,

1300
01:03:50,995 --> 01:03:52,872
the offenders will
now commence making out.

1301
01:03:53,039 --> 01:03:54,279
- Oh, fuck! Yeah, right.
- What?

1302
01:03:54,415 --> 01:03:55,708
You guys really
don't want to see that.

1303
01:03:55,875 --> 01:03:57,543
That's a joke,
that's disgusting. You're weird.

1304
01:03:57,710 --> 01:03:59,754
WOMAN: The longer you wait,
the longer the kiss.

1305
01:04:01,380 --> 01:04:04,220
- Look, there's no way I'm kissing him.
- Yeah I'm sorry, that's just...

1306
01:04:04,258 --> 01:04:06,260
All those who want to see
the offenders kiss,

1307
01:04:06,427 --> 01:04:07,707
- stomp your feet.
(ALL STOMPING)

1308
01:04:07,720 --> 01:04:09,472
That's unfair!
Clearly we're outnumbered.

1309
01:04:09,638 --> 01:04:11,766
MILLER: Yeah, OK, look, you guys
can stomp your feet all you want,

1310
01:04:11,932 --> 01:04:13,572
there's no way
I'm making out with a dude!

1311
01:04:13,684 --> 01:04:18,147
Do it. Or be forever branded
with the mark of the sisterhood.

1312
01:04:18,314 --> 01:04:19,482
CASEY: Holy shit.

1313
01:04:19,648 --> 01:04:21,650
Dude, I can't get branded.

1314
01:04:21,817 --> 01:04:24,862
I'm gonna like not be able
to get buried in a Jewish cemetery or...

1315
01:04:25,029 --> 01:04:26,447
Fuck it.

1316
01:04:27,990 --> 01:04:29,075
Really?

1317
01:04:29,700 --> 01:04:30,910
Fuck it, dude.

1318
01:04:34,288 --> 01:04:37,333
I just... I wish you were wearing more
than a tube sock, but fuck it, baby.

1319
01:04:37,500 --> 01:04:39,543
I really wish you
didn't call me baby.

1320
01:04:40,461 --> 01:04:41,545
OK.

1321
01:04:43,172 --> 01:04:44,715
- Tongue?
- Of course, tongue.

1322
01:04:44,882 --> 01:04:46,258
Really? You had to fucking ask
for tongue?

1323
01:04:46,425 --> 01:04:48,052
I'm sorry, that was stupid.

1324
01:04:51,639 --> 01:04:53,849
(WOMEN LAUGHING)

1325
01:04:56,435 --> 01:04:58,646
- Oh, grab his boobie.
- You never even did that.

1326
01:04:58,813 --> 01:05:00,272
Do it, offender.

1327
01:05:09,156 --> 01:05:12,910
Dude, are you getting
a chubby right now?

1328
01:05:13,077 --> 01:05:15,579
Dude, I can't help it. You're
actually kind of a good kisser.

1329
01:05:16,580 --> 01:05:17,873
You know what?
I'm fucking done.

1330
01:05:20,668 --> 01:05:22,711
(BIRDS TWITTERING)

1331
01:05:27,133 --> 01:05:29,844
- None of that ever happened.
- Ever.

1332
01:05:31,345 --> 01:05:33,180
- Hi, how are you?
- Hi.

1333
01:05:33,347 --> 01:05:35,516
We need to find
some clothes, man.

1334
01:05:35,683 --> 01:05:37,852
We'll get some
at Health Services.

1335
01:05:38,018 --> 01:05:40,146
(WOLF WHISTLE)

1336
01:05:40,312 --> 01:05:41,730
- Thanks, dude.
- Hey.

1337
01:05:41,897 --> 01:05:42,898
CASEY: All right,
it's already 6:00 a.m.

1338
01:05:43,065 --> 01:05:44,505
We gotta hurry up
and get Jeff Chang.

1339
01:05:44,525 --> 01:05:47,111
MILLER: Dude, if I walk any
faster my sock's gonna fall off.

1340
01:05:48,487 --> 01:05:51,240
- This is all your fault.
- What?

1341
01:05:51,407 --> 01:05:53,325
You made Jeff Chang go out,
got him wasted,

1342
01:05:53,492 --> 01:05:56,370
you fucked with the Latin sorority
girls, you pulled a gun out on Randy.

1343
01:05:56,537 --> 01:05:58,378
OK, look, you cannot pin
all this on me, Casey.

1344
01:05:58,456 --> 01:06:00,856
You're the reason why we are
currently walking through campus

1345
01:06:00,875 --> 01:06:02,995
at six in the morning wearing
only socks on our cocks!

1346
01:06:03,043 --> 01:06:05,629
OK. I'm sorry for trying
to show you guys a good time.

1347
01:06:05,796 --> 01:06:08,557
You know what, man, we're done. OK?
When this is over don't e-mail me,

1348
01:06:08,632 --> 01:06:09,842
- don't text me, don't call me...
- Whoa!

1349
01:06:10,009 --> 01:06:11,677
...don't poke me...
you and me are fucking over!

1350
01:06:11,844 --> 01:06:14,388
Oh, and another thing,
Sidewinder sucks!

1351
01:06:15,890 --> 01:06:16,849
Take it back.

1352
01:06:17,016 --> 01:06:18,696
It's hot, it's dirty,
the people are gross,

1353
01:06:18,851 --> 01:06:20,212
and half the acts are fucking DJs.

1354
01:06:20,352 --> 01:06:21,812
Why would I want
to spend a week of my life

1355
01:06:21,979 --> 01:06:23,898
watching some asshole
in a pink track suit

1356
01:06:24,064 --> 01:06:25,224
play his fucking iPod for me?

1357
01:06:25,274 --> 01:06:26,484
Because your friends
are gonna be there...

1358
01:06:26,650 --> 01:06:28,736
I'm not going to some
stupid fucking music festival

1359
01:06:28,903 --> 01:06:31,783
just to preserve the illusion that
we're still friends because we're not.

1360
01:06:31,906 --> 01:06:33,949
We're not still friends
anymore, Miller.

1361
01:06:35,910 --> 01:06:38,204
OK. It's cool, man.

1362
01:06:40,289 --> 01:06:42,500
So since we're not friends, I can tell
you how fucking lame you've been.

1363
01:06:42,666 --> 01:06:44,335
I can tell you that you probably
should go to Wall Street

1364
01:06:44,502 --> 01:06:47,338
and that you should spend the funnest
years of your life in an office.

1365
01:06:47,505 --> 01:06:49,385
Working for the man,
wearing a cute little suit.

1366
01:06:49,423 --> 01:06:52,176
It's called growing up, dude.
Why don't you look into it?

1367
01:06:52,343 --> 01:06:54,383
I don't need to grow up, bro,
you need to grow down.

1368
01:06:54,470 --> 01:06:56,430
- That's not even an expression!
- Well, today it is! OK?

1369
01:06:56,597 --> 01:06:58,015
Do you remember what it's like
to have fun, to be cool,

1370
01:06:58,182 --> 01:06:59,183
to give a shit
about your friends?

1371
01:06:59,350 --> 01:07:01,101
- You've changed.
- Oh, my God.

1372
01:07:01,268 --> 01:07:03,395
You don't have fucking balls
anymore. You're a little bitch.

1373
01:07:03,562 --> 01:07:07,233
Well, you know what, man? You're just
the fucking same desperate, low-life,

1374
01:07:07,399 --> 01:07:08,984
- fucking loser that you've always been.
- Yeah?

1375
01:07:09,151 --> 01:07:12,191
- Yeah. So fucking kudos to you, man!
- Don't fucking push me. Don't start...

1376
01:07:12,196 --> 01:07:14,116
You're a fucking dick, dude!
Fucking white trash!

1377
01:07:14,281 --> 01:07:16,200
- Fucking hands off!
(BOTH GRUNTING)

1378
01:07:16,367 --> 01:07:18,077
Yeah, take it, bitch!

1379
01:07:18,244 --> 01:07:20,329
CASEY: - Fucking asshole!
MILLER: - Could fight...

1380
01:07:22,248 --> 01:07:24,500
- You fight like a girl.
(GRUNTING)

1381
01:07:31,382 --> 01:07:33,217
(OFFICE PHONE RINGING)

1382
01:07:33,384 --> 01:07:35,384
WOMAN: Health Services,
how can I direct your call?

1383
01:07:35,511 --> 01:07:37,721
(INDISTINCT CHATTER OVER PA)

1384
01:07:38,597 --> 01:07:39,932
WOMAN: I'll call you back.

1385
01:07:43,310 --> 01:07:45,396
Mental Health, third floor.

1386
01:07:45,563 --> 01:07:48,315
- You're hilarious.
- We're hereto pick up our friend.

1387
01:07:48,482 --> 01:07:49,692
Name of patient?

1388
01:07:49,858 --> 01:07:51,986
Jeffrey Reginald Chang.

1389
01:07:52,152 --> 01:07:55,155
Plus if you had any clothes,
that would be greatly appreciated.

1390
01:07:56,282 --> 01:07:58,742
He's here. Let me get his file.

1391
01:07:58,909 --> 01:08:01,579
MILLER: And if you could please
hurry up, we're in a rush here.

1392
01:08:03,330 --> 01:08:05,165
Thank God I don't know
anyone at this school.

1393
01:08:07,418 --> 01:08:08,419
Casey?

1394
01:08:09,837 --> 01:08:12,715
Nicole. Hi.

1395
01:08:12,881 --> 01:08:15,676
Um... where are your clothes?

1396
01:08:15,843 --> 01:08:18,596
We just got jumped by some girls.
It's a long story.

1397
01:08:18,762 --> 01:08:20,514
- I bet.
- What are you doing here?

1398
01:08:20,681 --> 01:08:23,601
Um... Randy got mauled
by a buffalo, remember?

1399
01:08:23,767 --> 01:08:25,769
Right, yes! How is that guy?

1400
01:08:25,936 --> 01:08:28,606
- He's fine, I guess.
- Yeah?

1401
01:08:28,772 --> 01:08:33,652
I mean, I came over hereto check on him
and he got all agro on me again.

1402
01:08:33,819 --> 01:08:37,197
And then, I got pissed
and we broke up.

1403
01:08:37,364 --> 01:08:38,657
- Wow.
- Yeah.

1404
01:08:38,824 --> 01:08:41,035
So, we're pretty much done.

1405
01:08:41,201 --> 01:08:43,037
- Really?
- Hm-mm.

1406
01:08:43,203 --> 01:08:45,039
- Are you OK?
- Yeah, Oh, it's fine.

1407
01:08:45,205 --> 01:08:47,124
I mean, we weren't
really that serious.

1408
01:08:47,291 --> 01:08:50,044
- But, still, I mean...
- Yeah, it was a long time coming.

1409
01:08:50,210 --> 01:08:51,462
- OK.
- Anyway...

1410
01:08:51,629 --> 01:08:54,965
...it looks like I'm going
to South America by myself now, so...

1411
01:08:55,132 --> 01:08:56,759
- Oh, right, the trip.
- Hm-mm.

1412
01:08:56,925 --> 01:08:58,802
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, no, I'm still going.

1413
01:08:58,969 --> 01:08:59,970
Cool.

1414
01:09:00,137 --> 01:09:03,766
Yeah, my flight leaves
in a few hours, so...

1415
01:09:05,559 --> 01:09:07,519
...I guess this is goodbye.

1416
01:09:14,485 --> 01:09:15,653
OK.

1417
01:09:16,320 --> 01:09:17,446
Bye.

1418
01:09:20,074 --> 01:09:22,368
- Can I go with you?
- No thanks, I'm good.

1419
01:09:22,534 --> 01:09:24,078
OK, well, whenever
you're not good,

1420
01:09:24,244 --> 01:09:26,205
I'll be right here,
reading Perfect Bride.

1421
01:09:26,372 --> 01:09:27,331
(QUIET SCOFF)

1422
01:09:27,498 --> 01:09:29,917
What, I can't read
<i>Perfect Bride</i>, bro?

1423
01:09:31,835 --> 01:09:34,213
I'm sorry, Jeffrey Chang
is on 24-hour hold.

1424
01:09:34,380 --> 01:09:36,215
He can't be released
until tomorrow morning.

1425
01:09:36,382 --> 01:09:37,800
- What?
- No, he's gotta be home by 7:00 a.m.

1426
01:09:37,966 --> 01:09:40,177
- Why is he on hold?
(SIGHS) It's confidential.

1427
01:09:40,344 --> 01:09:41,720
Oh, it's confidential, Casey.
Give me that.

1428
01:09:41,887 --> 01:09:45,599
Hey! Give that back immediately!
Give me that! You, stop!

1429
01:09:45,766 --> 01:09:47,351
My God, look how many times
he's been in here, man.

1430
01:09:47,518 --> 01:09:49,436
Give that back to me,
you little shit!

1431
01:09:50,604 --> 01:09:52,064
Oh, my God.

1432
01:09:52,231 --> 01:09:54,316
"Patient was brought in
for attempted murder.

1433
01:09:54,483 --> 01:09:58,404
Later determined his weapon
misfired during a suicide attempt."

1434
01:09:58,570 --> 01:10:00,656
Jeff Chang tried
to commit suicide?

1435
01:10:02,491 --> 01:10:04,368
Get out. Now!

1436
01:10:10,207 --> 01:10:12,042
Dude, what the fuck is going on?

1437
01:10:13,419 --> 01:10:16,130
I mean, Jeff Chang
was always the happy one.

1438
01:10:16,296 --> 01:10:19,174
What were we supposed to do?
He didn't tell us anything.

1439
01:10:19,341 --> 01:10:22,261
Dude, look, fuck that. OK?

1440
01:10:22,428 --> 01:10:25,973
We are his best friends, and he felt
like he couldn't even call us.

1441
01:10:26,974 --> 01:10:28,183
That sucks.

1442
01:10:29,518 --> 01:10:30,686
We suck.

1443
01:10:34,523 --> 01:10:35,983
What happened, man?

1444
01:10:36,984 --> 01:10:38,777
We used to be so close and...

1445
01:10:39,486 --> 01:10:40,988
Ah, fuck.

1446
01:10:42,698 --> 01:10:44,324
(DOOR OPENING)

1447
01:10:44,491 --> 01:10:46,827
- Thanks, Erin.
- No problem, Gary. See you next time.

1448
01:10:48,704 --> 01:10:51,039
Jesus, not The Chief again.

1449
01:10:51,206 --> 01:10:52,875
What's up, Chief?

1450
01:10:53,041 --> 01:10:55,002
Oh, hey, dudes.
How was your night?

1451
01:10:55,169 --> 01:10:57,337
- Pretty terrible, actually.
- Tell me about it.

1452
01:10:57,504 --> 01:11:00,090
I ripped two sheets of LSD
and spent the whole night

1453
01:11:00,257 --> 01:11:02,593
dancing in front of my house again.

1454
01:11:02,760 --> 01:11:04,553
Now I gotta go teach.

1455
01:11:09,850 --> 01:11:11,518
Wait. Did The Chief just say

1456
01:11:11,685 --> 01:11:13,765
he was dancing in front of his house
the whole night?

1457
01:11:13,812 --> 01:11:15,564
- Yeah, so what?
- That's it!

1458
01:11:15,731 --> 01:11:17,171
- What's it?
- Oh, my God, that's it!

1459
01:11:17,274 --> 01:11:18,317
What's it?
What are you talking about?

1460
01:11:18,484 --> 01:11:19,693
OK. So, the first time
we saw The Chief

1461
01:11:19,860 --> 01:11:21,111
was in front
of Jeff Chang's place, right?

1462
01:11:21,278 --> 01:11:22,988
And then we saw him
like nine more times.

1463
01:11:23,155 --> 01:11:25,532
Right, and we thought that he was
just wandering around campus all night,

1464
01:11:25,699 --> 01:11:28,452
just like we were.
But what if he wasn't?

1465
01:11:28,619 --> 01:11:32,247
What if The Chief was
in the exact same place the entire time?

1466
01:11:32,414 --> 01:11:35,542
Then that would mean we walked past
Jeff Chang's place a dozen times.

1467
01:11:35,709 --> 01:11:37,510
- Oh, my God!
- Yes, and that's why Jeff Chang

1468
01:11:37,544 --> 01:11:38,670
kept mumbling those Indian chants.

1469
01:11:38,837 --> 01:11:40,547
It was because he was trying
to tell us where he lived.

1470
01:11:40,714 --> 01:11:42,257
It's like <i>The Da Vinci Code</i>
except it makes sense.

1471
01:11:42,424 --> 01:11:45,304
Oh, my God, we are officially the two
biggest morons in the entire world.

1472
01:11:45,344 --> 01:11:47,513
Yeah. Hey, Chief,
where do you live?

1473
01:11:47,679 --> 01:11:50,557
- Um... Fifth and Broadway.
- Fifth and Broadway.

1474
01:11:50,724 --> 01:11:52,226
All right, so wait,
here's what we gotta do.

1475
01:11:52,392 --> 01:11:53,811
- We gotta break Jeff Chang out.
- Break him out.

1476
01:11:53,977 --> 01:11:56,146
- Get him home, gotta get him sober...
- Sober him up.

1477
01:11:56,313 --> 01:11:57,481
...and then we gotta
get him showered and dressed

1478
01:11:57,648 --> 01:12:00,442
before his dad shows up,
which is in 36 minutes.

1479
01:12:00,609 --> 01:12:03,153
- That sounds totally impossible.
- Yeah?

1480
01:12:03,320 --> 01:12:04,446
Well, I'm not gonna let
Jeff Chang down again.

1481
01:12:04,613 --> 01:12:06,281
No, let's get that
little fucker home.

1482
01:12:07,074 --> 01:12:08,784
Wait, wait.
Are we best friends again?

1483
01:12:08,951 --> 01:12:10,702
- No.
- Right. No, I'm not either.

1484
01:12:10,869 --> 01:12:11,703
Cool.

1485
01:12:12,204 --> 01:12:13,044
(UP-TEMPO SONG PLAYS)

1486
01:12:13,205 --> 01:12:14,832
(DOOR BUZZING)

1487
01:12:15,707 --> 01:12:18,252
Hey, hey, you can't be in here!

1488
01:12:19,628 --> 01:12:20,963
- Jeff Chang!
- Jeff Chang!

1489
01:12:21,129 --> 01:12:22,381
- Jeff Chang!
- God, God!

1490
01:12:22,548 --> 01:12:24,341
(INDISTINCT PA CHATTER)

1491
01:12:24,508 --> 01:12:26,260
- Jeff Chang!
- Jeff Chang!

1492
01:12:26,426 --> 01:12:28,637
Have you seen a little Asian
with shit on his face? No? Thank you.

1493
01:12:28,804 --> 01:12:30,264
- Jeff Chang!
- Jeff Chang!

1494
01:12:30,430 --> 01:12:32,558
CASEY: - Hey, he's in here!
MILLER: - Nice!

1495
01:12:32,724 --> 01:12:34,226
We're gonna break you out,
buddy.

1496
01:12:34,393 --> 01:12:35,853
- Jeff Chang!
- He's barely coherent.

1497
01:12:36,019 --> 01:12:37,104
(MOANING)

1498
01:12:37,271 --> 01:12:38,605
Man, how're we gonna
get him outta here?

1499
01:12:38,772 --> 01:12:40,691
There's like orderlies everywhere!

1500
01:12:40,858 --> 01:12:43,485
Casey.
I just had an awesome idea.

1501
01:12:43,652 --> 01:12:45,779
This is definitely
not an awesome idea.

1502
01:12:45,946 --> 01:12:47,906
MILLER: It'll be fine.
I've done this a thousand times.

1503
01:12:48,073 --> 01:12:49,491
CASEY: 
No, that's what you said last time.

1504
01:12:49,658 --> 01:12:52,286
Hey, you gotta trust me.
Now bring him a little to the left. OK.

1505
01:12:52,452 --> 01:12:54,037
No, no, we gotta
pull him back up.

1506
01:12:54,204 --> 01:12:56,373
MILLER: That's the Spirit Mobile.
It's super tall.

1507
01:12:56,540 --> 01:12:59,020
- I don't like this ride, guys.
CASEY: - No, it's too far down!

1508
01:12:59,042 --> 01:13:01,323
- Pull him back up!
- OK. You're right. Let's pull him up.

1509
01:13:01,336 --> 01:13:02,296
- Oh, shit!
- Miller!

1510
01:13:03,297 --> 01:13:04,506
(GRUNTING)

1511
01:13:04,673 --> 01:13:07,676
Oh, my God!
Did we just kill Jeff Chang again?

1512
01:13:12,180 --> 01:13:14,892
- Where's...? Where's the Spirit Mobile?
- I don't know. It was right here.

1513
01:13:15,058 --> 01:13:17,311
Oh, no. Did they drive off
with Jeff Chang on it?

1514
01:13:17,477 --> 01:13:18,770
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.

1515
01:13:18,937 --> 01:13:21,648
I thought it was only 20 feet.
How am I supposed to know?

1516
01:13:21,815 --> 01:13:23,233
(HONKING)

1517
01:13:26,653 --> 01:13:28,113
Come on, guys.
Get in. We're late.

1518
01:13:29,323 --> 01:13:31,575
- What the fuck?
- Randy, look!

1519
01:13:31,742 --> 01:13:33,535
It's the guys who stole
your smart phone.

1520
01:13:33,702 --> 01:13:35,454
- Fuckers.
- Why are they taking your truck, Randy?

1521
01:13:35,621 --> 01:13:38,248
- Get out of the Spirit Mobile!
- Oh shit! Go, go, go!

1522
01:13:39,207 --> 01:13:40,167
- Go!
- You're dead!

1523
01:13:40,334 --> 01:13:41,585
Hey!

1524
01:13:41,752 --> 01:13:43,921
(RAP SONG PLAYING)
(TIRES SQUEALING)

1525
01:13:44,087 --> 01:13:47,341
- Bitch.
- Hey, what was that all about?

1526
01:13:47,507 --> 01:13:48,675
Don't worry about it,
just drive, drive, drive.

1527
01:13:48,842 --> 01:13:49,676
(EXHALES)

1528
01:13:49,843 --> 01:13:52,095
- How'd you even start the car?
- The keys were in the ignition.

1529
01:13:52,262 --> 01:13:55,057
Fuck! I'm so late.
My dad's gonna kill me.

1530
01:13:55,223 --> 01:13:57,559
(OPERA MUSIC PLAYING)

1531
01:14:05,859 --> 01:14:07,653
(RAP SONG CONTINUES)

1532
01:14:09,112 --> 01:14:12,616
Hey, why is there a teddy bear
glued to my penis?

1533
01:14:12,783 --> 01:14:15,035
No idea, no idea
how that could have happened.

1534
01:14:15,202 --> 01:14:16,870
I miss you guys.

1535
01:14:17,037 --> 01:14:18,914
How come we never
hang out anymore?

1536
01:14:19,289 --> 01:14:21,041
- Wrong lane, wrong lane!
- Wrong lane!

1537
01:14:21,208 --> 01:14:23,543
(SCREAMING) You're in the wrong lane!
(HONKING)

1538
01:14:25,379 --> 01:14:27,540
Oh, my God, Jeff Chang,
you're fucking crazy right now!

1539
01:14:27,547 --> 01:14:28,747
I feel really alert right now.

1540
01:14:28,757 --> 01:14:30,258
- I feel like Spider-Man.
- What?

1541
01:14:30,425 --> 01:14:32,761
I just really wish I had my contacts on.

1542
01:14:32,928 --> 01:14:33,971
- Oh, my God!
- Fuck!

1543
01:14:34,137 --> 01:14:36,890
Parking meter, parking meter,
parking meter...!

1544
01:14:38,433 --> 01:14:41,311
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
Oh, my God, Oh, my God...

1545
01:14:41,478 --> 01:14:44,189
Oh, shit! What are you doing?
What are you doing?

1546
01:14:44,356 --> 01:14:46,608
(OPERA MUSIC CONTINUES)

1547
01:14:49,486 --> 01:14:51,738
(RAP SONG CONTINUES)
(JEFFCHANG LAUGHING)

1548
01:14:51,905 --> 01:14:53,782
Hit the brake, dude.
Dude, hit the brake! Hit the brake!

1549
01:14:53,949 --> 01:14:55,033
- No, stop!
- Dude, do it!

1550
01:14:55,200 --> 01:14:57,411
- Get off!
(TIRES SQUEALING)

1551
01:14:58,412 --> 01:15:01,540
- Ow!
(INDISTINCT SHOUTS)

1552
01:15:01,707 --> 01:15:03,667
Look, I don't want to die.
I want to go back to college.

1553
01:15:03,834 --> 01:15:06,378
I want to go to Alaska, I want
to make out with a black chick!

1554
01:15:06,545 --> 01:15:08,547
- I wanna fuck Casey's sister!
- What?

1555
01:15:08,714 --> 01:15:10,340
- You dropped out of school?
- Yeah!

1556
01:15:10,507 --> 01:15:12,009
Why would you do that, Miller?

1557
01:15:12,175 --> 01:15:14,428
Turn around and drive the car, please!

1558
01:15:15,178 --> 01:15:17,097
(SIREN WAILING)

1559
01:15:18,557 --> 01:15:21,393
Oh, my God, we're going to jail.
We're going to jail.

1560
01:15:23,020 --> 01:15:24,980
- I can shake them, no problem.
- No, don't shake them.

1561
01:15:25,147 --> 01:15:26,857
- Don't shake them!
(TIRES SQUEALING)

1562
01:15:27,024 --> 01:15:29,276
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
- Whoa!

1563
01:15:29,443 --> 01:15:31,528
CASEY: We're not on the street anymore.
This is not where cars go.

1564
01:15:31,695 --> 01:15:33,780
Cars don't go here.
Cars don't go here, Jeff Chang!

1565
01:15:35,699 --> 01:15:37,826
(SIREN WAILING)

1566
01:15:37,993 --> 01:15:39,453
Oh, my God. Are your eyes open?

1567
01:15:39,619 --> 01:15:40,996
- Fuck you.
- I can't tell.

1568
01:15:41,163 --> 01:15:44,458
- Oh, no. Oh, my God.
- Out of my way, nerds!

1569
01:15:46,460 --> 01:15:47,794
Hey, did you see that guy?

1570
01:15:49,463 --> 01:15:51,048
Casey, we need to neutralize the target

1571
01:15:51,214 --> 01:15:52,966
'cause he doesn't know
what the fuck's going on right now.

1572
01:15:53,133 --> 01:15:55,052
- Come on, guys.
MILLER: - Shit, shit, shit.

1573
01:15:56,178 --> 01:15:58,889
(ALL SHOUTING)

1574
01:15:59,056 --> 01:16:01,016
(LAUGHING)

1575
01:16:02,601 --> 01:16:04,728
(GASPING)

1576
01:16:04,895 --> 01:16:07,230
(SIREN WAILING)

1577
01:16:10,817 --> 01:16:13,987
Yeah, maybe I shouldn't be driving.

1578
01:16:16,907 --> 01:16:19,284
(OPERA MUSIC CONTINUES)

1579
01:16:29,377 --> 01:16:33,423
It's 6:51, we have nine minutes to clean
him up before his dad gets here.

1580
01:16:33,590 --> 01:16:34,424
Guys, my back hurts.

1581
01:16:34,591 --> 01:16:36,218
Yeah, we threw you out
a third-story window onto a SUV.

1582
01:16:36,384 --> 01:16:38,345
- What? Why would you do that?
MILLER: - You told us to.

1583
01:16:38,512 --> 01:16:39,792
JEFFCHANG: Why would I say that?

1584
01:16:39,846 --> 01:16:40,972
MILLER: Because we're your best friends.
We love you.

1585
01:16:41,139 --> 01:16:42,700
CASEY: Get him in the house!
Get him in!

1586
01:16:44,643 --> 01:16:45,811
What do we do about the bear?

1587
01:16:45,977 --> 01:16:47,604
I don't know, man, just fucking
hold him or something.

1588
01:16:47,771 --> 01:16:49,606
- Oh, my God.
- Let's go.

1589
01:16:49,773 --> 01:16:52,192
- Holy shit! What are you doing?
- Pull harder.

1590
01:16:52,359 --> 01:16:54,861
- I don't want to rip his dick off!
- I don't want that either!

1591
01:16:55,028 --> 01:16:56,708
- Fuck you!
- Seriously, pull harder, dude!

1592
01:16:56,863 --> 01:16:59,324
I don't know, man, Jeff Chang has
a super stretchy penis!

1593
01:16:59,491 --> 01:17:01,910
- Pull harder, dude!
- I'm trying to!

1594
01:17:02,077 --> 01:17:04,037
(JEFFCHANG SCREAMS)
- Fucking come on!

1595
01:17:05,330 --> 01:17:07,374
(SCREAMING)
- Oh, my God!

1596
01:17:08,375 --> 01:17:10,252
Dude, we just circumcised Jeff Chang.

1597
01:17:10,418 --> 01:17:12,796
- Who cares? Get him in the bathroom.
- Come on, buddy!

1598
01:17:22,722 --> 01:17:24,891
Dude, I can't believe
we actually pulled this off.

1599
01:17:25,058 --> 01:17:26,810
Yeah, of course we did, man,
we're fucking awesome.

1600
01:17:26,977 --> 01:17:29,771
- Small arms.
- Whatever. Come on.

1601
01:17:29,938 --> 01:17:32,399
- There we go.
- I don't know if I can do this.

1602
01:17:32,566 --> 01:17:34,734
- What are you talking about?
- Yeah, what do you mean?

1603
01:17:34,901 --> 01:17:37,737
I mean, like, I don't know
if I want go to med school

1604
01:17:37,904 --> 01:17:39,739
or be a doctor or any of it.

1605
01:17:42,284 --> 01:17:44,578
- Now you fucking tell us?
CASEY: - Miller, shut up.

1606
01:17:44,744 --> 01:17:46,746
No, dude, are you serious?
I fucking kissed a guy for you!

1607
01:17:46,913 --> 01:17:47,914
- Miller!
- What?

1608
01:17:48,081 --> 01:17:50,917
Yeah, I kissed Casey.
It was fucking gross.

1609
01:17:51,084 --> 01:17:52,544
- Yeah.
- Miller, shut up.

1610
01:17:52,711 --> 01:17:53,871
- What?
CASEY: - Let him talk.

1611
01:17:53,879 --> 01:17:56,631
Look, I'm sort of losing
my shit up here.

1612
01:17:59,342 --> 01:18:01,803
We heard that you tried to off yourself.

1613
01:18:01,970 --> 01:18:04,222
- Miller, really?
- What?

1614
01:18:04,389 --> 01:18:06,141
- Why'd you do it, man?
- I didn't.

1615
01:18:06,308 --> 01:18:09,853
- So then, what...?
- I mean, I did, sort of. I...

1616
01:18:10,020 --> 01:18:12,772
I was up for 72 hours studying.
I was cracked out on pills.

1617
01:18:12,939 --> 01:18:15,192
I was literally
hallucinating in my room,

1618
01:18:15,358 --> 01:18:17,027
but I didn't actually try to...

1619
01:18:17,194 --> 01:18:19,196
Right.
I do weird shit when I hallucinate too.

1620
01:18:19,362 --> 01:18:20,655
Yeah.

1621
01:18:21,907 --> 01:18:24,034
- You know?
- The doctors say I'm not suicidal.

1622
01:18:24,201 --> 01:18:26,578
They just think I'm fucking
stressed out of my mind.

1623
01:18:26,745 --> 01:18:28,496
- I mean, you guys know my dad.
- Yeah.

1624
01:18:28,663 --> 01:18:31,458
Yeah. He's been
riding me my whole life

1625
01:18:31,625 --> 01:18:34,502
to go to med school and be
a doctor, but I hate medicine.

1626
01:18:34,669 --> 01:18:37,923
I suck in science.
I'm fucking miserable.

1627
01:18:38,089 --> 01:18:40,133
- So, don't do it.
- Yeah. Fuck it.

1628
01:18:40,300 --> 01:18:43,136
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)
- Oh, shit, he's here. What should I do?

1629
01:18:43,303 --> 01:18:45,423
Honestly, I think you
have to tell him the truth, man.

1630
01:18:45,472 --> 01:18:47,015
I think that's pretty obvious
to everybody in this room.

1631
01:18:47,182 --> 01:18:49,517
- You gotta tell him the truth.
- Oh, my God, you guys are so white.

1632
01:18:49,684 --> 01:18:51,436
What?
Dude, that's really racist.

1633
01:18:51,603 --> 01:18:53,243
Yeah. White people
have feelings too, man.

1634
01:18:53,396 --> 01:18:54,856
I can't just tell him the truth.

1635
01:18:55,023 --> 01:18:57,943
I come from like five generations
of doctors. I'm the first-born son.

1636
01:18:58,109 --> 01:19:00,153
This is what's expected of me.

1637
01:19:00,320 --> 01:19:03,907
(KNOCKING CONTINUES)
- Fuck!

1638
01:19:04,074 --> 01:19:06,952
Dude, it's the rest of your life, man.
Stop being such a fucking pussy.

1639
01:19:07,994 --> 01:19:09,955
He's your dad, dude.
He'll understand.

1640
01:19:10,121 --> 01:19:11,748
- I promise.
- Yeah.

1641
01:19:12,999 --> 01:19:14,626
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

1642
01:19:17,712 --> 01:19:18,713
- Whoo!
(ALL YELLING)

1643
01:19:18,880 --> 01:19:19,714
- Holy shit!
- What the fuck?

1644
01:19:19,881 --> 01:19:21,424
You just got rocked, boy!

1645
01:19:21,591 --> 01:19:22,968
- You OK, buddy?
- What?

1646
01:19:23,134 --> 01:19:25,095
- Bat me.
- That was so hot, Randy.

1647
01:19:25,262 --> 01:19:28,306
Look, man, we're sorry that we stole
your truck, but like, calm down, man.

1648
01:19:28,473 --> 01:19:32,185
- Oh, no, this isn't about my truck.
(ALL SHOUTING)

1649
01:19:32,352 --> 01:19:33,395
- OK! OK!
- Chill, chill!

1650
01:19:33,561 --> 01:19:36,022
Oh, that lamp will
never work again, Randy!

1651
01:19:36,189 --> 01:19:38,358
- Yeah!
- OK, OK, OK, what is this about?

1652
01:19:38,525 --> 01:19:41,069
- Is this about your phone?
- Right, OK, we're sorry, Randy,

1653
01:19:41,236 --> 01:19:43,029
that we stole your truck
and your cell phone.

1654
01:19:43,196 --> 01:19:47,367
- This ain't about my phone neither.
- Wait! Whoa, whoa, whoa!

1655
01:19:47,534 --> 01:19:48,910
- Stop!
- Bitch!

1656
01:19:49,077 --> 01:19:50,578
That's my fucking boom box, man.

1657
01:19:50,745 --> 01:19:52,831
- What is it about? Is it about Nicole?
- Calm down!

1658
01:19:52,998 --> 01:19:54,799
Oh, my God, you didn't
even close with Nicole.

1659
01:19:54,958 --> 01:19:56,358
Yeah, but I was really close,
right?

1660
01:19:56,459 --> 01:19:58,044
No, there's no such thing as
almost fucking his girlfriend.

1661
01:19:58,211 --> 01:20:00,380
You either fucked his girlfriend
or you didn't.

1662
01:20:00,547 --> 01:20:02,132
- Stop talking, assholes!
- He didn't fuck your girlfriend!

1663
01:20:02,299 --> 01:20:03,717
- No, no, no, no.
- He didn't fuck your girlfriend!

1664
01:20:03,883 --> 01:20:05,563
- That's what I'm saying.
- Is this a joke?

1665
01:20:05,635 --> 01:20:06,803
I almost... I almost did.

1666
01:20:06,970 --> 01:20:09,389
Then you've almost
fucked every girl you know.

1667
01:20:09,556 --> 01:20:11,933
This is not about my truck
or my phone...

1668
01:20:12,100 --> 01:20:14,728
...or... my... girl!

1669
01:20:14,894 --> 01:20:16,521
- That's my laptop!
- Fuck your laptop!

1670
01:20:16,688 --> 01:20:18,398
Get a desktop, bitch!

1671
01:20:18,565 --> 01:20:21,234
You know what? This is definitely
about the dart in the face.

1672
01:20:21,401 --> 01:20:23,903
Honestly, I completely forgot about
the dart in your face. Are you OK?

1673
01:20:24,070 --> 01:20:25,911
- He's had a really rough night too.
- Shut up!

1674
01:20:25,989 --> 01:20:28,616
Come on, Randy! Do what I said,
fuck me in the ass, Randy!

1675
01:20:29,951 --> 01:20:31,870
What?

1676
01:20:32,370 --> 01:20:34,622
I mean, fuck them in the ass!
Just...

1677
01:20:34,789 --> 01:20:38,710
- What...
- The hell is going on here?

1678
01:20:38,877 --> 01:20:40,003
- Oh, shit.
- Fuck.

1679
01:20:40,170 --> 01:20:42,797
- Who the fuck is this guy?
- Hey.

1680
01:20:42,964 --> 01:20:45,675
I'm Jeffrey's father.
Who the fuck are you?

1681
01:20:46,801 --> 01:20:47,927
I'm Randy.

1682
01:20:48,094 --> 01:20:49,929
- He's Randy.
- That's Randy.

1683
01:20:51,639 --> 01:20:55,101
OK, Randy... I'm here to take my son
to his interview.

1684
01:20:55,268 --> 01:20:58,308
Well, he's not going with you, so why
don't you just get the fuck outta here?

1685
01:20:59,189 --> 01:21:03,109
Oh, no, he's definitely
coming with me.

1686
01:21:03,276 --> 01:21:04,319
Oh, shit.

1687
01:21:04,486 --> 01:21:07,864
Look, old man... don't make me
beat you in front of your son.

1688
01:21:08,031 --> 01:21:09,115
I wouldn't do that.

1689
01:21:10,992 --> 01:21:12,327
(GRUNTING)
(ALL SHOUTING)

1690
01:21:12,494 --> 01:21:14,079
- Holy shit!
- Shit!

1691
01:21:14,245 --> 01:21:15,622
(GRUNTING)
ALL: - Whoa!

1692
01:21:15,789 --> 01:21:17,457
That's what fucking happens, man.

1693
01:21:17,624 --> 01:21:20,877
(GROANS) Oh, your dad's a dick.
Oh, my arm.

1694
01:21:21,044 --> 01:21:21,920
You should probably stay down.

1695
01:21:22,087 --> 01:21:23,129
Let's go!

1696
01:21:24,964 --> 01:21:27,300
OK, you need to tell him that you
don't want to be a doctor right now.

1697
01:21:27,467 --> 01:21:28,927
I don't think this is a good time.

1698
01:21:29,094 --> 01:21:30,814
- Just fucking tell him.
- No. You tell him.

1699
01:21:30,929 --> 01:21:31,971
- No, no, no.
- I'm not fucking telling him.

1700
01:21:32,138 --> 01:21:33,598
- You fucking tell him.
- You fucking tell him.

1701
01:21:33,765 --> 01:21:35,517
MILLER: - You're not a pussy.
JEFFCHANG: - I am a pussy.

1702
01:21:35,683 --> 01:21:37,143
MILLER: - Tell him right now.
- Let's go, Jeffrey.

1703
01:21:37,310 --> 01:21:38,937
MAN: Holy shit...

1704
01:21:42,148 --> 01:21:43,316
Uh...

1705
01:21:45,860 --> 01:21:47,362
No, I'm not going.

1706
01:21:47,529 --> 01:21:49,197
What the hell are you talking about?

1707
01:21:49,364 --> 01:21:50,685
I don't want to go to med school.

1708
01:21:50,782 --> 01:21:52,826
- I don't want to be a doctor.
- Jeffrey.

1709
01:21:52,992 --> 01:21:54,632
I'm not...
No, I'm not a kid anymore, Dad.

1710
01:21:54,702 --> 01:21:59,040
I'm 21 years old and...
from here on out,

1711
01:21:59,207 --> 01:22:01,408
I'm gonna decide what I do
with my life and that's that.

1712
01:22:02,502 --> 01:22:05,342
What are you gonna do? Throw me off
a roof? These guys already did that.

1713
01:22:09,259 --> 01:22:10,510
(CHUCKLES) OK.

1714
01:22:12,178 --> 01:22:13,221
I get it.

1715
01:22:14,722 --> 01:22:17,016
- See, I told you he'd understand, man.
- I get it.

1716
01:22:17,183 --> 01:22:19,727
You're even dumber
than I thought.

1717
01:22:19,894 --> 01:22:22,230
- Get in the goddamn car, Jeffrey.
- No. No.

1718
01:22:22,397 --> 01:22:25,775
- You ungrateful little shit.
- Dad!

1719
01:22:25,942 --> 01:22:29,028
I can't believe I raised a worthless
piece of shit like you...

1720
01:22:29,195 --> 01:22:30,780
Oh, shit! Dude, what?

1721
01:22:30,947 --> 01:22:32,387
- That's my friend!
- Miller! Miller!

1722
01:22:32,490 --> 01:22:35,243
- That's my friend, dude.
- Just calm down.

1723
01:22:38,079 --> 01:22:39,414
No, Dad.

1724
01:22:41,541 --> 01:22:42,917
Why don't you just leave?

1725
01:22:44,461 --> 01:22:45,795
Just leave.

1726
01:22:47,881 --> 01:22:49,048
Now.

1727
01:22:58,641 --> 01:23:00,143
(DOOR SLAMMING)
- Yeah,

1728
01:23:00,310 --> 01:23:01,710
you just punched
my dad in the face.

1729
01:23:01,811 --> 01:23:04,105
I know. It felt good, though.

1730
01:23:04,272 --> 01:23:05,273
(CHUCKLES)

1731
01:23:05,440 --> 01:23:07,233
(LAUGHING)

1732
01:23:07,400 --> 01:23:08,735
Hey, man.

1733
01:23:11,279 --> 01:23:13,031
My dad's a dick, too.

1734
01:23:13,198 --> 01:23:16,242
I, uh... I'm sorry I broke
your apartment.

1735
01:23:18,161 --> 01:23:19,412
What the fuck is this?

1736
01:23:22,665 --> 01:23:24,459
(SIGHS)
Just listen to your heart.

1737
01:23:26,044 --> 01:23:29,589
- Listen to your heart.
- Yeah. All right, man. OK.

1738
01:23:32,467 --> 01:23:35,762
- Nice apology, Randy.
- That was heartfelt, Randy.

1739
01:23:37,096 --> 01:23:39,224
MAN: - See ya, guys!
(DOOR CLOSING)

1740
01:23:40,892 --> 01:23:43,311
- Who are those guys?
- Those guys are the weirdest guys.

1741
01:23:43,478 --> 01:23:45,063
- They're so weird.
- Yeah.

1742
01:23:47,982 --> 01:23:50,693
MILLER: - Dude, another good birthday.
- Yeah.

1743
01:23:50,860 --> 01:23:53,238
(LAUGHING)
- Yeah.

1744
01:23:53,404 --> 01:23:55,281
So, what are you gonna do now?

1745
01:23:55,448 --> 01:23:58,618
God, I don't know. You know,
I can do whatever the fuck I want.

1746
01:23:58,785 --> 01:24:02,205
You know, for once in my life, I don't
have to do what other people tell me.

1747
01:24:03,706 --> 01:24:07,085
I'm just gonna travel
and write music again and...

1748
01:24:07,252 --> 01:24:09,837
Fuck it. You know,
I'm just gonna live my life.

1749
01:24:10,672 --> 01:24:11,673
Yeah.

1750
01:24:13,550 --> 01:24:15,051
I'm glad you guys came.

1751
01:24:15,218 --> 01:24:17,095
Seriously, thanks for
being such good friends.

1752
01:24:17,262 --> 01:24:18,471
Yeah, dude.

1753
01:24:19,931 --> 01:24:21,307
Me and Casey will always
be there for you.

1754
01:24:21,474 --> 01:24:24,394
- I gotta go.
- What?

1755
01:24:24,561 --> 01:24:28,690
- Sorry, just... I'll call you.
- Yeah, way to ruin the moment, dick!

1756
01:24:28,856 --> 01:24:33,444
Love you guys! Good job standing
up to your dad, Jeff Chang!

1757
01:24:33,611 --> 01:24:36,322
My fucking dick hurts.
(CHUCKLES)

1758
01:24:36,823 --> 01:24:38,866
(UP-TEMPO SONG PLAYS)

1759
01:24:46,791 --> 01:24:50,044
Nicole, Nicole! Wait, wait.
No, no, no! Stop, stop!

1760
01:24:50,211 --> 01:24:51,546
Don't go! Don't...

1761
01:24:51,713 --> 01:24:54,382
God damn it! Fuck.

1762
01:24:58,219 --> 01:24:59,387
Fuck.

1763
01:25:01,389 --> 01:25:03,641
Why are you yelling
at my roommate?

1764
01:25:06,811 --> 01:25:07,812
But...

1765
01:25:09,731 --> 01:25:12,442
- Hey.
- I lent her my car while I'm traveling.

1766
01:25:13,610 --> 01:25:15,737
Oh, that's great.

1767
01:25:15,903 --> 01:25:17,697
(SIGHS) Um...

1768
01:25:17,864 --> 01:25:20,533
Was there something
you wanted to ask me?

1769
01:25:20,700 --> 01:25:22,869
Yes. Yeah.

1770
01:25:25,246 --> 01:25:27,957
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYS)

1771
01:25:49,687 --> 01:25:51,564
(CROWD CHEERING)

1772
01:26:22,428 --> 01:26:23,388
(LAUGHING)

1773
01:26:23,554 --> 01:26:27,183
MILLER: <i>God, look at all these freaks.
I love this!</i>

1774
01:26:27,350 --> 01:26:29,018
All right, guys, but seriously,
tomorrow at 9:00 a.m.,

1775
01:26:29,185 --> 01:26:30,853
I have my big admissions
interview at Northern.

1776
01:26:31,020 --> 01:26:32,260
So don't let me get too stupid.

1777
01:26:32,939 --> 01:26:34,607
I'm so psyched you're
going back to college, dude.

1778
01:26:34,774 --> 01:26:35,983
- Yeah.
- But seriously,

1779
01:26:36,150 --> 01:26:39,445
don't let me get too messed up.
It's really important to me.

1780
01:26:39,612 --> 01:26:41,280
- Of course, man.
- OK.

1781
01:26:41,447 --> 01:26:42,615
- We'll take care of you, dude.
- Yeah.

1782
01:26:42,782 --> 01:26:44,367
- OK.
- Yeah.

1783
01:26:44,534 --> 01:26:46,327
You're our little baby tonight.

1784
01:26:47,704 --> 01:26:49,789
(ALL LAUGHING)

1785
01:26:53,501 --> 01:26:55,294
(STEADY CLICKING)

1786
01:26:57,964 --> 01:27:00,216
MILLER: Shit, shit, shit!

1787
01:27:00,383 --> 01:27:02,385
Shit, I am so fucking late!

1788
01:27:04,470 --> 01:27:07,849
Ooh! I am so sorry that I'm late,
this is not like me.

1789
01:27:08,015 --> 01:27:09,475
This is actually
very unprofessional.

1790
01:27:09,642 --> 01:27:12,019
You would not believe
what happened to me last night.

1791
01:27:12,186 --> 01:27:15,857
I've been taking my academics really
serious lately so this is a shock to me.

1792
01:27:16,023 --> 01:27:18,818
But I'm very serious about this
university, I want you to know that.

1793
01:27:18,985 --> 01:27:22,530
- You know, I'm just trying to...
- Oh, hey, man, how you doin'?

1794
01:27:22,697 --> 01:27:26,367
No way. Oh, my God! Chief!

1795
01:27:26,534 --> 01:27:29,746
(LAUGHS)
Dude, you look like shit!

1796
01:27:29,912 --> 01:27:33,082
(UP-TEMPO ROCK SONG PLAYS)

1797
01:33:03,788 --> 01:33:04,628
(English - US - PSDH)